Scribbling Page

Standard Pakistani response template

2010-02-02T09:58:00.004+05:30

Dear Prime Minister Manmohan Singh/ ~~Atal Bihari Vajpayee~~ / ~~Narasimha Rao~~ / ~~Rajiv Gandhi~~ ,

Pakistan strongly condemns / ~~is shocked by~~ / ~~is pleasantly surprised with the success of our "freedom fighters"~~ in the loss of dozens / ~~hundreds~~ / ~~thousands~~ / ~~millions~~ of innocent lives in the bomb blasts / ~~sniper attack~~ / ~~hijacking~~ / ~~religious riots~~ / ~~other disaster~~ that occurred in ~~a busy marketplace~~ / ~~train~~ / ~~housing colony~~ / ~~Indian parliament building~~ / an upper-class hotel / ~~temple~~ in Mumbai / ~~Delhi~~ / ~~Kashmir~~ / ~~Assam~~ / ~~Punjab~~ / ~~Gujarat~~ / ~~Other~~ .

The Pakistani ~~citizens~~ / ~~soldiers~~ / "freedom fighters" / ~~"friendship agents"~~ / ~~students~~ who were ~~caught red-handed~~ / ~~found dead at the scene of the crime~~ / convicted of the crime are actually undercover Indian / ~~American~~ / ~~Israeli~~ agents. Any Pakistanis proven to be guilty of terrorism will be ~~rewarded handsomely~~ / dealt with severely / ~~promoted to Lt. Colonel~~ / ~~given a new Indian passport and sent back toIndia~~/ ~~handed over to the Americans~~ as proof of our commitment in the war on terror.

There are no Pakistani army-funded training camps / ~~terrorist camps~~ / ~~madrasaas~~ in Azad Kashmir / ~~Afghanistan~~ / ~~Nepal~~ / ~~Bangladesh~~ . The ~~satellite images~~ / ~~photographs~~ / ~~eyewitness accounts~~ / videotaped confessions obtained by the Indians ~~is fraudulent~~ / ~~fake~~ / ~~inconclusive~~ / are actually from Indian terrorist camps and part of a larger RAW / ~~CIA~~ conspiracy to destabilize the Pakistani government by ~~stalling democracy~~ / encouraging sectarian violence / ~~undermining Pakistani institutions~~ / ~~causing the next military coup in Pakistan~~ . A destabilized Pakistani government / ~~mafia~~ could cause Pakistan to become a dangerous nuclear WalMart / ~~Target~~ / ~~Seven-Eleven~~ and a terrorist breeding ground / ~~university~~ / ~~research lab~~ that would be worse for the world.

We hope this will not derail the peace process started with the recent ~~India-Pakistan cricket series~~ / ~~Lahore bus yatra~~ / ~~Muzafarabad-Srinagar road opening~~ / ~~Bollywood peace concert~~ / open borders initiative / ~~other confidence-building measures~~ . We look forward to justifying further attacks against innocent civilians / ~~resolving the core issue of Kashmir~~/ ~~developing best-of-breed plausible deniability defenses.~~

We stand by / ~~are plotting against~~ our Indian brethren in their hour / ~~days~~ / ~~years~~ / ~~decades~~ of pain.

Signed,

Asif Ali Zardari [alias Mr. 10%] / ~~Parvej Musharraf/ Nawaj Sharif/Benazir Bhutto~~
President, Pakistan / ~~Prime Minister/ Chief Operating Officer, Taliban Inc~~ . / ~~General, Pakistani Army~~

It was indeed a big dark cloud passing...

2009-12-31T10:07:00.000+05:30

I guess I erred last year same day when I wrote a post summarizing the year. I mentioned that it was a dark cloud passing, but I was wrong it was big dark cloud just entered and hope it passes by completely now. 2009 started where 2008 had left the things, only dates changed and nothing else.

The recession became heavier and then everyone felt the heat. Pay cuts, firings and many more were on their way. The software industry’s honeymoon was over and people were treated just like a pack of garbage, that’s how they were thrown away. The glooming days were just starting and everyone was looking for the light at the end of the tunnel… Every one was praying the tunnel shouldn’t be another year long. Something just happened, there was a fake economic boost and people started believing the same and fell for it. That was just a small plot to get the votes and to rule India for another five years, no need to saw people fell for it like a bunch of insects falling right into the insect buster.

It didn’t take long though the last quarter shown some signs of recovery and there was hope towards the coming year. There were reversal of pay cuts and promotions given and every company has promised hikes in the coming year. That’s why everyone is looking forward to the 2010. Other than economy there were many other things that caused a scare, swine flu was one of the major things that left people clueless. There are many more things other than this also but those things you can find on any papers what this year was with respect to sports and blah blah blah… I don’t want to waste my time writing that let the New Year be something similar to 2007 which was the best year in this whole decade I believe. 2007 gave hopes after the Tsunami in 2006. Let 2010 be something similar to 2007, so that it can give hope and cherishing life after the Economical Tsunami in 2008 and 2009.

Google’s border game

2009-11-19T12:17:00.008+05:30

Google – the god to, many techies, has another side which is masked from us. Just check the India map @ http://maps.google.co.in/ which is as shown below

The India map when seen through the google maps through their china link which is @ http://duti.google.com/ which is as shown below

The same India map when seen through the google maps through their America link which is @ http://maps.google.com/ which is as shown below

You find any difference. The first one when you see through http://maps.google.co.in/ from India, Google shows a map which has Jammu and Kashmir, Arunachal Pradesh as a part of India. The second one when you see through http://duti.google.com/ from China, Google shows quarter Jammu and Kashmir as a part of Pakistan, another quarter of Jammu and Kashmir and Arunachal Pradesh as a part of China. Whereas when you check the map from America using http://maps.google.com/ they show those regions with the border issue in dotted line. So which is the real map and who is google to do this. Please mail your opposition through Google mail @ press@google.com.

Those who have doubt can check themselves. Using the links that are given in the post. Both Google and Yahoo have a secret pact with China that they wont expose any truth about what's happening in Tibet. Now they are moving into another territory where they are trying to change boundaries of countries itself.

Don't be serious, be sincere."!!

2009-11-18T12:13:00.001+05:30

Speech by Chetan Bhagat at Symbiosis

Don’t just have career or academic goals. Set goals to give you a balanced, successful life. I use the word balanced before successful. Balanced means ensuring your health, relationships, mental peace are all in good order.

There is no point of getting a promotion on the day of your breakup. There is no fun in driving a car if your back hurts. Shopping is not enjoyable if your mind is full of tensions.

"Life is one of those races in nursery school where you have to run with a marble in a spoon kept in your mouth. If the marble falls, there is no point coming first. Same is with life where health and relationships are the marble. Your striving is only worth it if there is harmony in your life. Else, you may achieve the success, but this spark, this feeling of being excited and alive, will start to die. ……………….

One thing about nurturing the spark - don't take life seriously. Life is not meant to be taken seriously, as we are really temporary here. We are like a pre-paid card with limited validity. If we are lucky, we may last another 50 years. And 50 years is just 2,500 weekends. Do we really need to get so worked up? …………….

It's ok, bunk a few classes, scoring low in couple of papers, goof up a few interviews, take leave from work, fall in love, little fights with your spouse. We are people, not programmed devices........." :)

"Don't be serious, be sincere."!!

New phobias for mobile users....

2009-10-05T15:56:00.001+05:30

New technical names......for mobile users....extracts from indiatimes....

Nomophobia: The fear of being out of mobile phone contact. It’s the abbreviation for ‘no-mobile-phone phobia.’ It could be a result of low battery, broken phone, a no-cellphones-allowed sign, no signal, low balance, etc.

Phantom Ring: Imagining the mobile to be ringing or feel it vibrating in the pocket, when it’s actually not.

Pocket Patter: Patting your pockets to check if the mobile is still there.

Human Antenna: Stretching your arm to hold the phones at a height in the hope that it’ll get the strongest signal.

What women want...

2009-09-17T11:10:00.002+05:30

Young King Arthur was ambushed and imprisoned by the monarch of a neighboring kingdom. The monarch could have killed him but was moved by Arthur's youth and ideals.

So, the monarch offered him his freedom, as long as he could answer a very difficult question. Arthur would have a year to figure out the answer and, If after a year, he still had no answer, he would be put to death. The question was: What do women really want? Such a question would perplex even the most knowledgeable man, And to young Arthur, it seemed an impossible query.

But, since it was better than death, He accepted the monarch's proposition to have an answer by year's end. He returned to his kingdom and began to poll everyone: The princess, the priests, the wise men, and even the court jester. He spoke with everyone, but no one could give him a satisfactory answer.

Many people advised him to consult the old witch, for only she would have the answer. But the price would be high as the witch was famous through out the kingdom for the exorbitant prices she charged.

The last day of the year arrived and Arthur had no choice but to talk to the witch. She agreed to answer the question, but he would have to agree to her price first. The old witch wanted to marry Sir Lancelot, The most noble of the Knights of the Round Table, and

Arthur's closest friend! Young Arthur was horrified She was hunch-backed and hideous, had only one tooth, Smelled like sewage, made obscene noises, etc. He had never encountered such a repugnant creature in all his life.

He refused to force his friend to marry her and endure such a terrible burden,But Lancelot, having learnt of the proposal, spoke with Arthur. He said nothing was too big of a sacrifice compared to Arthur's life. And the preservation of the Round Table.

Hence, a wedding was proclaimed and the witch answered. Arthur's question thus: "What a woman really wants?" She said, "Is to be in charge of her own life." Everyone in the kingdom instantly knew that the witch had uttered a great truth. And that Arthur's life would be spared. And so it was. The neighboring monarch granted Arthur his freedom.

Lancelot and the witch had a wonderful wedding. The honeymoon hour approached and,

Lancelot, steeling himself for a horrific experience, entered the bedroom. But, what a sight awaited him. The most beautiful woman he had ever seen lay before him on the bed.

The astounded Lancelot asked what had happened. The beauty replied that since he had been so kind to her when she appeared as a witch, She would henceforth be her horrible and deformed self only half the time. And the beautiful maiden the other half.

"Which would you prefer? She asked him. "Beautiful during the day ... or at night?"

Lancelot pondered the predicament.

During the day he could have a beautiful woman to show off to his friends, But at night, in the privacy of his castle, an old witch!

Or,

Would he prefer having a hideous witch during the day? But by night a beautiful woman for him to enjoy wondrous, intimate moments with?

What Lancelot chose, is given below:

Noble Lancelot, knowing the answer the witch gave Arthur to his question, ("Is to be in charge of her own life.") He said that he would allow HER to make the choice herself. Upon hearing this, she announced that she would be beautiful all the time. Because, he had respected her enough to let her be in charge of her own life. Now... what is the moral to this story?

The moral is...

1) There is witch in every woman no matter how beautiful she is!

2) If you don't let a woman have her own way, things are going to get ugly.

So, always remember:

IT'S EITHER "HER WAY" OR IT'S "NO WAY" !!!

Difference among CV, Resume and BioData

2009-08-25T10:33:00.002+05:30

Thought this will be useful to people...

Difference among CV, Resume and BioData People use the words RESUME, C.V., and BIO-DATA interchangeably for the
document highlighting skills, education, and experience that a candidate
submits when applying for a job. On the surface level, all the three
mean the same. However, there are intricate differences.

RESUME Resume Is a French word meaning "summary", and true to the word
meaning, signifies a summary of one's employment, education, and other
skills, used in applying for a new position. A resume seldom exceeds one
side of an A4 sheet, and at the most two sides. They do not list out all
the education and qualifications, but only highlight specific skills
customized to target the job profile in question.
A resume is usually broken into bullets and written in the third person
to appear objective and formal. A good resume starts with a brief
Summary of Qualifications, followed by Areas of Strength or Industry
Expertise in keywords, followed by Professional Experience in reverse
chronological order. Focus is on the most recent experiences, and prior
experiences summarized. The content aims at providing the reader a
balance of responsibilities and accomplishments for each position. After
Work experience come Professional Affiliations, Computer Skills, and
Education

C.V CURRICULUM VITAE C.V Is a Latin word meaning "course of life". Curriculum
Vitae (C.V.) is therefore a regular or particular course of study
pertaining to education and life. A C.V. is more detailed than a resume,
usually 2 to 3 pages, but can run even longer as per the requirement. A
C.V. generally lists out every skills, jobs, degrees, and professional
affiliations the applicant has acquired, usually in chronological order.
A C.V. displays general talent rather than specific skills for any
specific positions.
BIO-DATA Bio Data the short form for Biographical Data, is the old-fashioned
terminology for Resume or C.V. The emphasis in a bio data is on personal
particulars like date of birth, religion, sex, race, nationality,
residence, martial status, and the like. Next comes a chronological
listing of education and experience. The things normally found in a
resume, that is specific skills for the job in question comes last, and
are seldom included. Bio-data also includes applications made in
specified formats as required by the company.

A resume is ideally suited when applying for middle and senior level
positions, where experience and specific skills rather than education is
important. A C.V., on the other hand is the preferred option for fresh
graduates, people looking for a career change, and those applying for
academic positions. The term bio-data is mostly used in India while
applying to government jobs, or when applying for research grants and
other situations where one has to submit descriptive essays.

Resumes present a summary of highlights and allow the prospective
employer to scan through the document visually or electronically, to see
if your skills match their available positions. A good resume can do
that very effectively, while a C.V. cannot. A bio-data could still
perform this role, especially if the format happens to be the one
recommended by the employer.

Personal information such as age, sex, religion and others, and hobbies
are never mentioned in a resume. Many people include such particulars in
the C.V. However, this is neither required nor considered in the US
market. A Bio-data, on the other hand always include such personal
particulars.

The Unknown Truth

2009-08-05T11:07:00.000+05:30

Five cannibals (Man eaters) get appointed as programmers in an IT company.

During the welcoming ceremony the boss says: "You're all part of our team now. You can earn good money here, and you can go to the company canteen for something to eat. So don't trouble the other employees".

The cannibals promise not to trouble the other employees.

Four weeks later the boss returns and says: "You're all working very hard, and I'm very satisfied with all of you. One of our developers has disappeared however. Do any of you know what happened to her?" The cannibals disown all knowledge of the missing developer. After the boss has left, the leader of the cannibals says to the others: "Which of you idiots ate the developer?"

One of the cannibals raises his hand hesitantly, to which the leader of the cannibals says: "You FOOL! For four weeks we've been eating team leaders, managers, HR, and project managers and no-one has noticed anything, and now YOU ate one developer and it got noticed. So here after please don't eat a person who is working."

Want to learn bosses language in 5 minutes?

2009-07-07T13:55:00.001+05:30

Do you want to impress or confuse clients or Vice versa? .........use Techno vocabulary... It can be called the "Buzzword" writing method.
It is simple.

There are three columns of words involved, as follows:

0. Balanced 0. Management 0. Contingency
1. Total 1. Organization 1. Hardware (or software)
2. Integrated 2. Reciprocal 2. Projection
3. Compatible 3. Monitored 3. Time-frame
4. Synchronized 4. Digital 4. Concept
5. Optimal 5. Modular 5. Programming
6. Responsive 6. Transitional 6. Mobility
7. Functional 7. Incremental 7. Capability
8. Parallel 8. Third-generation 8. Flexibility
9. Systemized 9. Policy 9. Options

Just select any three-digit number; then use the corresponding Buzzwords from the above grid, e.g., 257: "integrated modular capability". Don't worry if it doesn't make sense to you; it won't mean anything to anyone else either, but they'll think you're just smarter than they are so they won't say anything!! ...

You can propose "systemized reciprocal options" (929) to achieve "optimal transitional flexibility" (568), so that we can think of an "integrated monitored projection" (232).

Speech of DG Kashmir at UN

2009-06-17T10:18:00.002+05:30

An ingenious example of speech and politics occurred recently in the United Nations Assembly that made the world community smile.

A representative from India began: 'Before beginning my talk I want to tell you something about a rishi named Kashyapa of Kashmir (Kashyapa, son of Marichi, son of Brahma), after whom Kashmir is named.

When he struck a rock and it brought forth water, he thought, 'What a good opportunity to have a bath.' He removed his clothes, put them aside on the rock and entered the water. When he got out and wanted to dress, his clothes had vanished. A Pakistani had stolen them.'

The Pakistani representative jumped up furiously and shouted, 'What are you talking about? The Pakistanis weren't there at that time.'

The Indian representative smiled and said, 'And now that we have made that clear, I will begin my speech.'

............
......

“...............And they say Kashmir belongs to them..................”

If MS has Bing Google has Squared

2009-06-08T12:35:00.001+05:30

New Search Tool Google Squared Goes Live

Google Squared, a new search tool that Google described last month, is now live. Squared pulls information about members of a category from all over the Web and presents it in a table with rows and columns, instead of the series of page links typically returned by search engines.

A typical search on Google will return a list of relevant web sites, but users still have to visit ten to twenty Web sites to find information on complex questions, said Alex Komoroske, associate product manager for Google Squared in a post on Wednesday on Google's blog.

The experimental search tool Google Squared, on the other hand, collects information from different Web sites and presents it as an organized collection.

A search for U.S. states on Google Squared for example returns the names of the states in the first column, and pictures from the states, descriptions, the state's motto, information on population, and state birds in subsequent columns.

Users can customize the table to add a new column such as capital of the state or name of governor from a list provided, or add to the list.

The information on the grids on the table links to Web sites containng more detailed information on that particular aspect of the topic.

Users can also save the table using a Google account, and move on to the usual search on Google from within the same page.

The technology has just been released as part of Google Labs, and is by no means perfect, Komoroske said.

More info @
http://www.pcworld.com/businesscenter/article/166080/new_search_tool_google_squared_goes_live.html
http://www.google.com/squared

Article about elections in India on New York Times

2009-06-02T12:44:00.000+05:30

“THE INDIAN ELECTIONS-NEW YORK TIMES”

It is truly the greatest show on Earth, an ode to a diverse and democratic ethos, where 700 million + of humanity vote, providing their small part in directing their ancient civilization into the future. It is no less impressive when done in a neighborhood which includes de-stabilizing and violent Pakistan, China, and Burma.

Its challenges are immense, more so probably than anywhere else, particularly in development and fending off terrorism -- but considering these challenges and its neighbors, it is even more astounding that the most diverse nation on Earth, with hundreds of languages, all religions and cultures, is not only surviving, but thriving.

The nation where Hinduism, Buddhism, Jainism, and Sikhism were born, which is the second largest Muslim nation on Earth; where Christianity has existed for 2000 years; where the oldest Jewish synagogues and Jewish communities have resided since the Romans burnt their 2nd temple; where the Dalai Lama and the Tibetan government in exile reside; where the Zorostrians from Persia have thrived since being thrown out of their ancient homeland; where Armenians and Syrians and many others have to come live; where the Paris-based OECD said was the largest economy on Earth for 1500 of the last 2000 years, including the 2nd largest, only 200 years ago; where 3 Muslim Presidents have been elected, where a Sikh is Prime Minister and the head of the ruling party a Catholic Italian woman, where the President is also a woman, succeeding a Muslim
President who as a rocket scientist is a hero in the nation; where a booming economy is lifting 40 million out of poverty each year and is expected to have the majority of its population in the middle class already, equal to the entire US population, by 2025; where its optimism and vibrancy is manifested in its movies, arts, economic growth, and voting, despite all the incredible challenges and hardships; where all the great powers are vying for influence, as it itself finds its place in the world.

Where all of this is happening, is India, and as greater than 1/10th of humanity gets ready to vote, it is an inspiration to all the World.

- V Mitchell, New York, NY

The Song which am humming right now

2009-05-06T17:02:00.005+05:30

The New site I came across recently

2009-05-04T10:12:00.012+05:30

I recently came across this site, its summer time and we people really need really good tv programs to watch isn’t it. This site is called mytvoptions, where there are lots of options for your TV programs. They have HD, Sports, Movies, International, Special offers, Local Channels and TV Resources genres. The NTSC aspect ratio is 4:3 and the HD TV aspect ratio is 16:9.

They have rating for HD Service Providers Rating also, DirectSatT V is the rating topper, followed by Dish Network, Comcast, COX, Qwest and Other Cable service providers. The Satellite Directv is the best opinion and which provides futuristic and advanced fearture options to the customers
They also have poll for the service and also have easy hook up guide for connection your television's HD cable to the Direct Satellite TV box. They also have the list of channels that their satellite DirectsatTV supports.

YOU ARE A MASTERPIECE Celebrate your Uniqueness.

2009-04-20T17:22:00.003+05:30

A plum once said, just because a banana lover came by, I converted myself into a banana. Unfortunately,his taste changed after a few months and so I became an orange. When he said I was bitter I became an apple, but he went in search of grapes. Yielding to the opinions of so many people, I have changed so many times that I no more know who I am. How I wish I had remained a plum and waited for a plum lover.

Just because a group of people do not accept you as you are, there is no necessity for you to strip yourself of your originality. You need to think good of yourself, for the world takes you at your own estimate. Never stoop down in order to gain recognition. Never let go of your true self to win a relationship. In the long run, you will regret that you traded your greatest glory - your uniqueness, for momentary validation. Even Gandhi was not accepted by many people. The group that does not accept you as you is not your world.

There is a world for each one of you, where you shall reign as king / queen by just being yourself. Find that world... in fact, that world will find you.

What water can do, gasoline cannot and what copper can, gold cannot. The fragility of the ant enables it to move and the rigidity of the tree enables it to stay rooted. Everything and everybody has been designed with a proportion of uniqueness to serve a purpose that we can fulfil only by being our unique self. You as you alone can serve your purpose and I as I alone can serve my purpose. You are here to be you... just you.

There was a time in this world when a Krishna was required and he was sent; a time when a Christ was required and he was sent; a time when a Mahatma was required and he was sent; a time when a J.R.D.Tata was required and he was sent. There came a time when you
were required on this planet and hence you were sent. Let us be the best we can be. Don't miss yourself and let the world not miss you.

In the history of the universe, there has been nobody like you and to the infinite of time to come, there will be no one like you. Existence should have loved you so much that it broke the mould after making you, so that another of your kind will never get repeated. You are original. You are rare. You are unique. You are a wonder. You are a masterpiece... your Master's piece. Celebrate your Uniqueness.

Our Indians' Money - 70,00,000 Crores Rupees In Swiss Bank

2009-04-02T10:40:00.002+05:30

1) Yes, 70 lakhs crores rupees of India are lying in Switzerland banks. This is the highest amount lying outside any country, from amongst 180 countries of the world, as if India is the champion of Black Money.
2) German Government has officially written to Indian Government that they (German Government) are willing to inform the details of holders of 70 lakh crore rupees in their Banks, if Indian Government officially asks them.
3) On 22-5-08, this news has already been published in The Times of India and other Newspapers based on German Government's official letter to Indian Government.
4) But the Indian Government has not sent any official enquiry to Germany for details of money which has been sent outside India between 1947 to 2008. The opposition party is also equally not interested in doing so because most of the amount is owned by politicians and it is every Indian's money.
5) This money belongs to our country. From these funds we can repay 13 times of our country's foreign debt. The interest alone can take care of the Centre's yearly budget. People need not pay any taxes and we can pay Rs. 1 lakh to each of 45 crore poor families.
6) Let us imagine, if Swiss Bank is holding Rs. 70 lakh crores, then how much money is lying in other 69 Banks? How much they have deprived the Indian people? Just think, if the Account holder dies, the bank becomes the owner of the funds in his account.
7) Are these people totally ignorant about the philosophy of Karma? What will this ill-gotten wealth do to them and their families when they own/use such money, generated out of corruption and exploitation?
8) Indian people have read and have known about these facts. But the helpless people have neither time nor inclination to do anything in the matter. This is like "a new freedom struggle" and we will have to fight this.
9) This money is the result of our sweat and blood. The wealth generated and earned after putting in lots of mental and physical efforts by Indian people must be brought back to our country.
10) As a service to our motherland and you contribution to this struggle, please circulate at least 10 copies of this note amongst your friends and relatives and convert it into a mass movement.

Its all about Software Engineers

2009-03-20T09:07:00.001+05:30

10% of Software Professionals are predicted to be affected by major diseases like Carpal tunnel syndrome, heart diseases etc

20% of Software Professionals marry their co-workers

30% of Software Professionals are interested in Live in relationship because they tend to hate the responsibility both in office and house

40% of Software Professionals are confused about settling down (India or abroad)

50% of Software Professionals has No savings in their Bank Account

60% of Software Professionals are not satisfied with their current wages

70% of Software Professionals work more than 8 hours across globe

80% of Software Professionals live away from their Parents

90% of Software Professionals are NOT HAPPY about their Life, meeting deadlines, client satisfaction, incentives, promotions, increment, onsite trips, wife, children, visa status, and commitments

100% of Software professionals wish they had a choice other than computers in their life at least once in their lifetime

A Guy's Letter

2009-03-19T09:55:00.001+05:30

அன்பே!

நீ சொன்னாய் என்பதற்காகத்தான் உனது அப்பாவிடம் பேசிப் பார்க்கலாம் என்ற முடிவுக்கு வந்தேன். 'அலுவலகத்தில் இருக்கிறேன் , நீல்கிரிஸில் சாயங்கலாம் சந்திக்கலாம்' என உன் தகப்பன் தொலைபேசியில் சொன்னபோது கடமை தவறாதவனின் மகளைத்தான் காதலித்திருக்கிறோம் என இறுமாந்திருந்தேன்.சொன்னபடி ஐந்து மணிக்கெல்லாம் வந்தமர்ந்த உனது அப்பனைப் பார்த்த போது 'எருமை மாட்டிற்கு மான் குட்டி எப்படி பிறந்தது?!' என்ற பழைய கவிதைதான் நினைவிற்கு வந்தது. மான்குட்டி என்ற வர்ணனை உனக்கு அதிக பட்சம்தான் என்றாலும் எருமை மாடு என்பது உனது அப்பனுக்கு மிகக் குறைந்த பட்சம்தான். அந்தக் கடையில் பில் போடுவதற்காக இருந்த கம்ப்யூட்டரைத் தவிர மீதம் இருந்த அனைத்தையும் தீன்று தீர்த்துவிடும் வெறி அவரது கண்களில் மின்னியதை நான் கவனிக்கத் தவறிவிட்டேன். சரி எதையாவது சாப்பிட்டுவிட்டு பேச்சைத்
துவங்கலாம் என சர்வரை அழைத்தேன். அதற்குப் பின் உனது அப்பனின் கைங்கர்யத்தால் சமையல் கட்டிற்கும் டேபிளிற்கும் இடையே சுமார் ஐம்பது ஓட்டங்கள் எடுத்தான் சர்வர். ராயப்பாஸிலும், தலப்பாகட்டிலும் நீ புஃல் கட்டு கட்டுவது ஒரு ஜெனடிக் பிரச்சனை என்பதைக் கண்டுகொண்டேன். வேழ முகம்தான் இல்லையே தவிர பேழை வயிறு இருக்கிறது உன் பரம்பரைக்கே... அவரது வேட்டையை முடிவுக்கு கொண்டு வர இயலாதவனாக கையறு நிலையில் இருந்தபோது ' தம்பி இப்பல்லாம் முன்ன மாதிரி சாப்பிடமுடியறதில்லபா...
வயசாச்சில்ல...' என தன் திருவாய் மலர்ந்தார். திடப்பொருட்களிலிருந்து ரோஸ்மில்க் போன்ற திரவப் பொருட்களுக்கு மாறினார். அப்பாடா, முடித்துவிட்டார் என்ற ஆசுவாசத்தை ' ஒரு கஸாடா' என்ற வார்த்தையில் உடைத்தார். கஸாட்டாவும், ஜர்தா பீடாவும் சாப்பிடுவதில்லை என்பதைத் தவிர திருச்செந்தூர் கோவிலில் உண்டைக்கட்டிக்கு காத்திருக்கும் கோவில் யானைக்கும் உனது அப்பனுக்கும் ஆறு வித்தியாசங்கள் கூட இல்லை. 'தம்பி எப்ப சாப்பிட்டாலும் கடைசியா ஒரு ஐஸ் க்ரீம் சாப்பிடுறது நல்லதுப்பா' என்ற அவரது கூற்றில் இருந்த கடைசியா எனும் வார்த்தைதான் எனக்கு வாழ்வின் மீது நம்பிக்கையை ஏற்படுத்தியது. 'சார், நான் உங்க பொண்ணை விரும்புறேன். அவளையே கல்யாணம் பண்ணிக்க ஆசைப்படுறேன். அது விஷயமாப் பேசத்தான் உங்களுக்கு போன் பண்ணினேன்' என்று மெல்ல பேச்சைத் துவங்கினேன். ' அப்ப போனவாரம் இதே விஷயமாப் பேச 'ஆனந்தபவனுக்கு' வந்தது நீங்க இல்லையா தம்பி?!' என ஆச்சர்யமாக அவர் கேட்டபோதுதான், மொத்தக்குடும்பமும் இரை எடுப்பதற்கென்றே எவனையாவது இரையாக்குவதை புரொபஷனல் டச்சோடு செய்கிறீர்கள் என்பதை உணர்ந்தேன். "தம்பி இது பெரிய விஷயம், ஒரு நாளில் பேசித் தீர்த்துவிட முடியாது. நீங்க
ஒன்னு பண்ணுங்க... நாளக்கி சாயங்காலம் அன்னபூர்ணா வந்துடுங்க... அப்ப பேசிக்கலாம்" என்ற உனது தகப்பனைக் கொலை செய்ய அந்த நேரம் என்னிடம் துப்பாக்கி இல்லாமல் போனது துர்பாக்கியமே.

இப்படிக்கு,
இரை தேடும் குடும்பத்திற்கு இரையாகிவிடாமல் இறையருளால் தப்பித்த உன்னுடைய
முன்னாள் காதலன்.
வாழ்க வளமுடன்!

What If Microsoft is Everywhere??? - Just For Fun

2009-03-14T12:01:00.003+05:30

WHERE AM I?
A helicopter was flying around above Seattle when an electrical malfunction disabled all
of the aircraft's electronic navigation and communications equipment. Due to the clouds
and haze, the pilot could not determine the helicopter's position. The pilot saw a tall
building, flew toward it, circled, and held up a handwritten sign that said 'WHERE AM
I?' in large letters. People in the tall building quickly responded to the aircraft, drew a
large sign, and held it in a building window. Their sign said 'YOU ARE IN A
HELICOPTER.'
The pilot smiled, waved, looked at his map, determined the course to steer to SEATAC
airport, and landed safely. After they were on the ground, the copilot asked the pilot how
he had done it.
'I knew it had to be the Microsoft Building, because they gave me a technically correct
but completely useless answer.'

If Restaurants Worked Like Microsoft
Server: Hi, my name is Bill, and I'll be your Support Server. What seems to the the problem?
Patron: There's a fly in my soup!
Server: Try again, maybe the fly won't be there this time.
Patron: No, it's still there.
Server: Maybe it's the way you're using the soup; try eating it with a fork instead.
Patron: Even when I use the fork, the fly is still there.
Server: Maybe the soup is incompatible with the bowl; what kind of bowl are you using?
Patron: A SOUP bowl!
Server: Hmmm, that should work. Maybe it's a configuration problem; how was the bowl set up?
Patron: You brought it to me on a saucer; what has that got to do with the fly in my soup?!
Server: Can you remember everything you did before you noticed the fly in your soup?
Patron: I sat down and ordered the Soup of the Day!
Server: Have you considered upgrading to the latest Soup of the Day?
Patron: You have more than one Soup of the Day each day??
Server: Yes, the Soup of the Day is changed every hour.
Patron: Well, what is the Soup of the Day now?
Server: The current Soup of the Day is tomato.
Patron: Fine. Bring me the tomato soup and the check. I'm running late now.
Server leaves and returns with another bowl of soup and the check.
Server: Here you are, Sir. The soup and your check.
Patron: This is potato soup.
Server: Yes, the tomato soup wasn't ready yet.
Patron: Well, I'm so hungry now, I'll eat anything.
Server leaves.
Patron: Server! There's a gnat in my soup!

The check:

Soup of the Day £5.00
Upgrade to newer Soup of the Day £2.50
Access to support £1.00
------
£8.50

At a recent Sacramento PC User's Group meeting, a company was demonstrating its latest speech-recognition software. A representative from the company was just about ready to start the demonstration and asked everyone in the room to quiet down.
Just then someone in the back of the room yelled, "Format C:
Return."
Someone else chimed in: "Yes, Return!"
Unfortunately, the software worked.

Copy Cats?

Two young engineers applied for a single position at a computer company. They both had the same qualifications. In order to determine which individual to hire, the applicants were asked to take a test by the Department Manager. Upon completion of the test, both men missed only one of the questions.
The manager went to the first applicant and said, "Thank you for your interest, but we`ve decided to give the job to the other applicant."
"And why would you be doing that ? We both got 9 questions correct," asked the rejected applicant.
"We have based our decision not on the correct answers, but on the question you missed," said the Department manager.
"And just how would one incorrect answer be better than the other?" the rejected applicant inquired.
"Simple, "said the Department manager, "Your fellow applicant put down on question No. 5, `I don`t know` and You put down, `Neither do I.` "

Solutions for Problems due File Extensions

2009-03-12T09:15:00.000+05:30

I have personally experienced problems with handling file whose extensions are new to me and I have also seen problems with other people trying to figure out how to access a file whose extension is entirely unheard and new. If you have similar problems then it is going to be solved as simple as that.

There is a site where you can search for File Extension, collect details about the file and know what type of file that is and what kind of data it contains. How can we open it and find out what is there in it.

For example File Extension mdi corresponds to either MIDI-sequention Sound or Borland Multiple Document Interface or Office Document Imaging File.

Another example is File Extension jad is Java Application Descriptor File. You can also get support for scanning your computer for problems for a particular type of file, Repair Registry conflicts for a particular type of file and fix it also. There is free scan also available.

A Good Joke :: Must read for every IT professiona

2009-03-11T10:58:00.003+05:30

In a poor zoo of India, a lion was frustrated as he was offered not more than 1 kg meat a day.

One day the lion thought its prayers were answered when a US Zoo Manager visited the zoo and requested the zoo management to shift the lion to a US zoo. The lion was pleased and started thinking of a central A/C environment,a goat or two every day and a US Green Card

On it's first day after arrival, the lion was offered a big bag, sealed very nicely, for breakfast. It opened the bag quickly but was shocked to see that it contained only a few bananas.

Controlling its anger, the lion thought that may be they cared too much for him as they were worried about his stomach as he had recently shifted from India. The next day the same thing happened. On the third day again the same food bag of bananas was delivered.

Now the lion was furious. It stopped the delivery boy and blasted him,"Don't you know, I am the lion...King of the Jungle....What's wrong with your management? What nonsense is this? Why are you delivering bananas to me ?"

The delivery boy politely said, "Sir, I know you are the King of the Jungle but....do you know that you have been brought here on a monkey's visa!!!

Moral : Better to be a Lion in India than a Monkey elsewhere .....

Forgot to mention subject in mail???

2009-03-06T12:56:00.004+05:30

Very useful precaution, have tried this just now, its working, please doing it in your Outlook too, reading below…
Forgot to mention subject while writing an Official Mail and feel bad later??????? Yes…. It's a concern for all….
A mail without a subject brings a bad impression on us. To avoid this, just follow the simple steps mentioned below and see the result.
Here are the steps: -
1. Open your Outlook,
2. Press Alt+F11. This opens the Visual Basic Editor and open Project-Project 1 (left side). If this dosen’t opens Project-Project 1 then press then Press Ctrl+R.
3. On the Left Pane, one can see "Microsoft Outlook Objects" or "Project1", expand this. Now one can see the "ThisOutLookSession".
4. Double click on "ThisOutLookSession". It will open up a Code Pane on the right hand side.
5. Copy and Paste the following code in the right pane (Code Pane) and save it
Private Sub Application_ItemSend(ByVal Item As Object, Cancel As Boolean)
Dim strSubject As String strSubject = Item.Subject
If Len(Trim(strSubject)) = 0 Then
Prompt$ = "Subject is Empty. Are you sure you want to send the Mail?"
If MsgBox(Prompt$, vbYesNo + vbQuestion + vbMsgBoxSetForeground, "Check for Subject") = vbNo Then
Cancel = True
End If
End If
End Sub
6. Now whenever you try to send a mail without subject, a pop-up is raised to remind you of the blank subject.
Share this useful information to all

The Post Office Job Interview...

2009-03-05T10:06:00.003+05:30

A guy goes to the Post Office to apply for a job.
The interviewer asks him "Are you allergic to anything?"
He says "Yes, just caffeine."
"Have you ever been in the service?" the interviewer asks.
"Yes," he says, "I was in Iraq for two years."
The interviewer says "That will give you 5 extra points toward employment here.", and then asks, "Are you disabled in any way?"
The guy says, "Yes... an IED exploded near me and blew my testicles clean off."
The interviewer tells the guy "O.K. In that case, I can hire you right now. Normal hours are from 8am to 4pm. You can start tomorrow at 10am, and plan on starting at 10am every day. Don't worry, we'll still pay you from 8am."
The guy is puzzled and says "If the hours are from 8am to 4pm, why don't you want me to be here before 10am?"
"'This is a government job," the interviewer says. "For the first two hours we just stand around drinking coffee and scratching our balls. No point in you coming in for that."

A nice article by Swami Vivekananda...

2009-02-25T10:26:00.001+05:30

I once had a friend who grew to be very close to me. Once when we were sitting at the edge of a swimming pool, she filled the palm of her hand with some water and held it before me, and said this:
"You see this water carefully contained on my hand? It symbolizes Love."

This was how I saw it:
As long as you keep your hand caringly open and allow it to remain there, it will always be there. However, if you attempt to close your fingers round it and try to posses it, it will spill through the first cracks it finds. This is the greatest mistake that people do when they meet love...they try to posses it, they demand, they expect... and just like the water spilling out of your hand, love will retrieve from you. For love is meant to be free, you cannot change its nature. If there are people you love, allow them to be free beings.

Give and don't expect.
Advise, but don't order.
Ask!, but never demand.

It might sound simple, but it is a lesson that may take a lifetime to truly practice. It is the secret to true love. To truly practice it,
you must sincerely feel no expectations from those who you love, and yet an unconditional caring." Passing thought... Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take; but by the moments that take our breath away.....

Life is beautiful!!!
Live it !!!

A group of 4 to 8 year-old Childrens explained the meaning of Love Interesting ..................

2009-02-17T09:11:00.000+05:30

A group of 4 to 8 year-old Children was asked, "What does love mean?" The answers they gave were broader and deeper than anyone could have imagined.

--"Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it everyday" (Tina - age 7)

--"My mommy loves me more than anybody. You don't see anyone else kissing me to sleep at night." (Clare - Age 5)

--"When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You know that your name is safe in their mouth." (Billy - age 4)

--"When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn't bend over and paint her toenails anymore. So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That's love." (Rebecca - age 8)

--"Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French
fries without making them give you any of theirs." (Chrissy - age 6)

--"Love is what makes you smile when you're tired." (Terri - age 4)

--"Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip
before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK." (Danny - age 7)

--"Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still
friends even after they know each other so well." (Tommy - age 6)

--"During my piano recital, I was on a stage and scared. I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and smiling. He was the only one doing that. I wasn't scared anymore. That's love" (Cindy -age 8)

TWO TOUGH QUESTIONS

2009-02-14T14:54:00.002+05:30

Question 1: If you knew a woman who was pregnant, who had 8 kids already, three who were deaf, two who were blind, one mentally retarded, and she had syphilis, would you recommend that she have an abortion? Read the next question before looking at the response for this one. Question 2: It is time to elect a new world leader, and only your vote counts. Here are the facts about the three candidates. Candidate A. Associates with crooked politicians, and consults with astrologists. He's had two mistresses. He also chain smokes and drinks 8 to 10 martinis a day. Candidate B He was kicked out of office twice, sleeps untilnoon , used opium in college and drinks a quart of whiskey every evening. Candidate C He is a decorated war hero. He's a vegetarian, doesn't smoke, drinks an occasional beer and never cheated on his wife. Which of these candidates would be your choice? Decide first... no peeking, and then scroll down for the response.
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Answer 2 : Candidate A is Franklin D. Roosevelt. Candidate B is Winston Churchill. Candidate C is Adolph Hitler. And, by the way, on your answer to the abortion question: If you said YES . . . ... . . you just killed Beethoven - Gr8 musician Pretty interesting isn't it? Makes a person think before judging someone.

NINE WORDS WOMEN USE

2009-02-13T09:49:00.002+05:30

(1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

(2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

(3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.
(4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!

(5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)

(6) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

(7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome' . that will bring on a 'whatever').

(8) Whatever: Is a woman's way of saying F-- YOU!

(9) Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to # 3.

What is the gender of Computer???

2009-02-11T09:31:00.001+05:30

A SPANISH Teacher was explaining to her class that in Spanish, unlike English, nouns are designated as either masculine or feminine.
'House' for instance, is feminine: 'la casa.'
'Pencil,' however, is masculine: 'el lapiz.'

A student asked, 'What gender is 'computer'?'

Instead of giving the answer, the teacher split the class into two groups, male and female, and asked them to decide for themselves whether computer' should be a masculine or a feminine noun. Each group was asked to give four reasons for its recommendation.

The men's group decided that 'computer' should definitely be of the feminine gender ('la computadora'), because:
1. No one but their creator understands their internal logic;

2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else;

3. Even the smallest mistakes are stored in long term memory for possible later retrieval; and

4.. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.

(THIS GETS BETTER!)

The women's group, however, concluded that computers should be Masculine ('el computador'), because:

1. In order to do anything with them, you have to turn them on;

2. They have a lot of data but still can't think for themselves;

3. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they ARE the problem; and

4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you had waited a little longer, you could have gotten a better model.

The women won.

Strange...about Microsoft Calculator

2009-02-10T10:09:00.002+05:30

Microsoft's Calculator Failed in following calculation.

Go to Start-->Run-->type Calc. and Check the following....

2704/50 = 54.08 Works Fine
2704/51 = 53.01960784 Works Fine
2704/52 = try yourself Doesn't Work
2704/53 = 51.01886792 Works Fine
2704/54 = 50.07407407 Works Fine

Microsoft Calculator Failed

Try it ....it’s surprise

Mind Blowing Vocabulary

2009-02-04T09:50:00.000+05:30

The person who invented this sentence is either a Vocabulary GENIUS or is absolutely JOBLESS.

Why?

You'll soon find out!!!

Read the sentence below carefully...

"I do not know where family doctors acquired illegibly perplexing handwriting nevertheless, extraordinary pharmaceutical intellectuality counterbalancing indecipherability, transcendentalizes intercommunications incomprehensibleness".

This is a sentence where the nth word is n letters long.

e.g. 3rd word is 3 letters long, 8th word is 8 letters long and so on

This is awesome - I bet you didn't know this...

2009-02-03T10:59:00.001+05:30

Letters 'a', 'b', 'c' & 'd' do not appear anywhere in the spellings of 1 to 99

Letter 'd' comes for the first time in Hundred

Letters 'a', 'b' & 'c' do not appear anywhere in the spellings of 1 to 999

Letter 'a' comes for the first time in Thousand

Letters 'b' & 'c' do not appear anywhere in the spellings of 1 to 999,999,999

Letter 'b' comes for the first time in Billion

And

Letter 'c' does not appear anywhere in in the spellings of entire English Counting.

Ingenious!!

2009-02-03T10:20:00.000+05:30

Speech of DG Kashmir at UN

An ingenious example of speech and politics occurred recently in the United Nations Assembly that made the world community smile.

A representative from India began: 'Before beginning my talk I want to tell you something about a rishi named Kashyapa of Kashmir (Kashyapa, son of Marichi, son of Brahma), after whom Kashmir is named.

When he struck a rock and it brought forth water, he thought, 'What a good opportunity to have a bath.' He removed his clothes, put them aside on the rock and entered the water. When he got out and wanted to dress, his clothes had vanished. A Pakistani had stolen them.'

The Pakistani representative jumped up furiously and shouted, 'What are you talking about? The Pakistanis weren't there at that time.'

The Indian representative smiled and said, 'And now that we have made that clear, I will begin my speech.'

"...............And they say Kashmir belongs to them..................

Great magician

2009-01-20T09:54:00.003+05:30

Three world famous magicians were in the bar drinking and boasting about their achievements.

The first one said," During my latest show, I made three women from the audience disappear, it was so convincing that their relatives started panicking, no one could find the trick"

The second one said, " Hey, that is nothing, during one of my open air shows I made the Municipality building disappear and the entire town was searching for it"

The third one sighed and said," Both of you are so local, I went to Paris and made the Eiffel Tower disappear for a full one hour, it was live on the TV, entire France was searching for the building & no one had a clue".
Just then an Indian walked into the bar and the three magicians suddenly turned quiet, gave each other fugitive glances and started to slip towards the door.

A Bartender watching this got curious and asked one of the magicians, "Hey what happened ?
Who is that guy ?"

One of the magicians whispered, " He is the World's greatest magician, he has done the biggest disappearing trick of all times, we are all mere amateurs compared with what he has done. His name is Ramalinga Raju. He has made USD 1.5 billion disappear from his company's balance sheet in front of everyone's eyes, and the entire world is still looking for it "

ராசி பலன்கள் 2009

2009-01-19T14:55:00.005+05:30

மேஷ ராசி மக்களே!

ஏலேய் மக்கா, ரெண்டாவது மாடியிலிருந்து, மூணாவது மாடிக்கு குரு பெயர்ச்சி ஆகறதால, நீங்க 2ல இருந்தா 1க்கும், 1ல இருந்தா 0க்கும், 0ல இருந்தா, அதான் கீழ் போர்ஷன்ல இருந்தா பூமிக்கடியில போய் ஒளிஞ்சிக்கோங்க! மேலும் நீங்க இங்கிலீசுல 'a,e,i,o,u', அப்புறம் தமிழில 'கசடதபற'ல ஆரம்பிக்கிற வார்த்தைகளை 126 நாள் பேசக்கூடாது. ஜோடி நெம்பர் ஒன்னோ, மானாட மயிலாடவோ மாங்கு மாங்குன்னு பார்த்தா, கல்யாணம் ஆகாதவங்களுக்குக்கூட விவாகரத்து நடக்க வாய்ப்பிருக்கு.
பரிகாரம்: ராமராஜனையோ, ஜே.கே. ரித்தீஷையோ உங்க காஸ்ட்யூம் டிசைனரா நியமிச்சு, அவங்க சொல்ற கலருல வலம் வருதல் ஷேமம்.

ரிஷப ராசி மக்களே!

நீங்க அடுத்த ஆறு மாசத்துக்கு நேரா நிமிர்ந்து நடக்கக்கூடாது. 98.3டிகிரி
சாய்ஞ்சாப்ல நடக்கறது நல்லது. நடக்கறப்போ முக்கியமா உங்க வலதுகாலும், இடதுகாலும் உரசவே கூடாது. அப்படி நடக்காலேன்னா என்ன ஆகும்னு கேக்கறீகளா, நடக்கக்கூடாததெல்லாம் நடந்துரும். யோகாதிபதியான குரு, பாதகாதிபதியான சனியோட வீட்டுல வலுக்கட்டாயமா தொடர்வதால, உங்க புள்ளைக்கு எந்தக் கல்லூரியில இடம் கிடைக்கலைன்னாலும், சட்டக் கல்லூரியிலயாவது இடம் கிடைக்கும்.
பரிகாரம்: உங்களுக்கு ஏழரை உச்சத்துல உட்கார்ந்துறதால, 'நாலரை பால்' குடிக்கிறது நல்லது.

மிதுன ராசி மக்களே!

எஸ்.எம்.எஸ் அனுப்பி அனுப்பியே, முடக்குவாதம் வந்த மிதுன மக்களே, அடுத்த குருபெயர்ச்சிவரை நீங்க செல்லைக் கையால தொடக்கூடாது, காதாலயும் தொடக்கூடாது. குரு ஆறுல இருந்து பாஸாகி ஏழுக்கு வந்தாலும், சனி எட்டாம் பாதத்துலயிருந்து தொடர்ந்து 'நோக்கியா'. அதனால செல்லோட யாரும் பக்கத்துல வந்தாக்கூட கல்லைக் கண்ட நாய் மாதிரி தறிகெட்டு ஓடுறது நலம். இல்லாட்டி சனி ரிங்டோனா 'சங்கு சவுண்டை' அனுப்பி வைக்கும்.

பரிகாரம்: ரிலையன்ஸ் அம்பானிக்கு வாராவாரம் ஞாயித்துக்கிழமை நெய் விளக்கு போடணும்

கடக ராசி மக்களே!

சன் டிவிக்கும் கலைஞர் டிவிக்கும் வித்தியாசம் தெரியாம திரியுற நீங்க, இன்னும் ஏழரை மாசத்துக்கு, டி.விப் பொட்டியில, நியூஸே பார்க்கக்கூடாது. அதுவும் அடியில் ப்ளாஷ் நியூஸ் ஓடிச்சுன்னா, தெறிச்சு தெற்குப் பக்கமா ஓடுறது நல்லது. ஏன்னா, ஓடிப்போனவனுக்கு ஒன்பதாம் வீட்டில் குரு. உங்க ராசியோட அஞ்சாவது வீட்டை குரு குத்துமதிப்பா பார்க்குறதால, மதுரைக்குப் போய் மறந்து தினகரன் வாங்கிடப் போறீங்க, கவனம்.

பரிகாரம்: டேபிள்ல குரு இருந்தாலும் வீட்டுக்குள்ள வர்ற கேபிள்ல சனி இருக்கறதால, உங்க வீட்டு ரிமோட்டை உடனடியா எடுத்துட்டுப் போய், பேங்க் லாக்கர்ல வைச்சிருங்கோ!முரசொலியில் ராசிபலன் வருகிறதா என்று தேடிப்பாருங்கோ!

சிம்ம ராசி மக்களே!

குருவும் ராகுவும் ஒரே நேரத்துல நாலாம் பாதத்துக்கு 'Login' ஆகியிருக்கறதால, இன்னும் 222 நாளுக்கு நீங்க இமெயில் செக் பண்ணக்கூடாது. சாட் ஆகவே ஆகாது. 'orkut, facebook' பக்கம் தலை, கை, கால் எது வைச்சும் படுக்கக்கூடாது. முக்கியமா வலைப்பதிவை கொலைவெறியோட பண்ணுறவங்க, அந்தப்பக்கமே வரக்கூடாது. ஜூன், ஜூலை மாதத்துல குரு லாப வீட்டுல குந்தப்போறதால, மேட்ரிமோனியல்ல
பதிஞ்சு வைச்சுருக்கிற கன்னிப்பசங்களுக்கு உடனடியா சஷ்டியப்த பூர்த்தி ப்ராப்திரஸ்து!

பரிகாரம்: சனிக்கிழமைதோறும் இட்லிவடையைத் தேடிக் கண்டுபிடிச்சு வடைமாலை சாத்தறது உத்தமம்.

கன்னி ராசி மக்களே!

ஹைக்கூ.. பைக்கூ.. கொக்கரக்கூ.. இப்படி எந்தவித கவிதைகளையும் உங்க வாழ்க்கையில நீங்க இன்னும் அரை வருசத்துக்கு நுழையவிடக்கூடாது. வைரமுத்து, வாலி வகையறாக்களை பாத்தா உங்க வாய் 'வாய்தா' வாங்கிட்டு போயிடறது நல்லது. முக்கியமா பின்நவீனத்துவக்காரங்ககிட்ட முன்னெச்சரிக்கையா இருக்கறது நல்லது. இதையெல்லாம் மீறி நீங்க காதல் கவிதை படிச்சீங்கன்னா, குருவே தடுத்தாலும் உங்க கண்ணை 'சனி பகவானோட' காக்கா வந்து கொத்திரும்.

பரிகாரம்: வாரம் ஒருமுறை மூணு கிலோ 'கவித' பொஸ்தகம் வாங்கி, 'கழுதை'க்கு தானம் பண்ணனும்.

துலாம் ராசி மக்களே!

கார்ப்பரேட் கம்பெனிகள் எடுக்குற எந்த சினிமாவுலயும் கதையே இல்லாததால உங்க வாழ்க்கைக் கதையில எதிர்பாராத யூ-டர்ன் வர வாய்ப்பிருக்கு. ஆகவே நீங்க இன்னும் நாலேகால் மாசத்துக்கு நயன்தாராவைப் பார்க்கக்கூடாது. ஸ்ரேயா ஆகவே ஆகாது. மல்லிகா ஷெராவத்தை மனசால நினைச்சாகூட எதிர்த்த வீட்டு ஆயா, ஆப்பக்கரண்டியால அடிக்க வாய்ப்பிருக்குது. முக்கியமா, தியேட்டர், டி.வி, விசிடி இப்படி எதுல சினிமா பாத்தாலும் உங்களுக்கு சனிமா!

பரிகாரம்: வடபழனி அருகே கோடம்பாக்கத்தில் அருள்பாலிக்கும் நமீதாம்பாளை வடக்கே சூலம் இருக்கும் நாளில் சென்று வணங்குதல் நல்லது.

விருச்சிக ராசி மக்களே!

யார் எதைச்சொன்னாலும் கேட்காத விருச்சிக மக்களே, நான் இப்ப சொல்லுறதையும் நீங்க கேட்கப்போறதில்ல. அதனால நானும் எதுவும் சொல்லப் போறதில்ல!

பரிகாரம்: யார் என்ன பரிகாரம் சொன்னாலும் செய்யாமலிருப்பது.

தனுசு ராசி மக்களே!

நீங்க 'i'ல ஆரம்பிக்கிற பேங்குல அக்கௌண்ட் வைச்சிருந்தா உடனே அதை வேற எங்கேயாவது மாத்திடுங்க. இன்னும் 8 மாசத்துக்கு 'i'யோட சகவாசமே ஆகாது. இவ்ளோ நாள் ஒஸாமா லக்கினத்துல இருந்த குரு இப்போ ஒபாமா லக்கினத்துக்கு கம்பி நீட்டியிருக்கிறதால உங்களுக்கு கார்டுல கண்டம். கிரெடிட் கார்டை கிழிச்சுப் போடுங்க. டெபிட் கார்டை டெலிட் பண்ணுங்க. ரேஷன் கார்டை 'ஒரு ரூபாய்'க்கு வித்துருங்க.

பரிகாரம்: தினமும் ஒரு ஆளுக்கு ஒபாமா ஹேர்கட்டிங் செஞ்சு விடுறது நல்லது.

மகர ராசி மக்களே!

வாஸ்துப்படி குரு உங்களுக்கு குண்டக்க மண்டக்க பெயர்ச்சி அடைஞ்சிருக்கறதால, இன்னும் 7 மாசத்துக்கு நீங்க உங்க வீட்டுக்குள்ள முன்வாசல் வழியா நுழையக்கூடாது. பின்வாசலும் ஆகாது. அதனால சன்னல் வழியா போனா இன்னல் இருக்காது. டூ பாத்ரூம் டாய்லெட்ல போகாதீங்க. கோலத்தை வாசல்ல போடாதீங்க. மீறினா, தேறமாட்டீங்க.

பரிகாரம்: பேசாம கொஞ்ச நாளைக்கு ஃப்ளாட்பாரத்துல வாழுங்க!

கும்ப ராசி மக்களே!

இப்ப 'கரண்ட்'ஆ நடந்திருக்கிற குரு பெயர்ச்சியால, உங்களுக்கு 'கரண்டுல' கண்டம். அதனால வீட்டுல உள்ள எலெக்ட்ரிக் ஐயிட்டத்தையெல்லாம் வித்துடுங்க. ஜீரோ வாட்ஸ் பல்பு கூட இருக்கக் கூடாது. சொல்லப்போனா, பேப்பர்ல வர்ற 'கரண்ட்' நியூஸைக்கூட படிக்கக்கூடாது.

பரிகாரம்: அமாவாசை அன்னிக்கு மின்சார வாரியம் புள்ளையார் கோயில்ல ஆற்காட்டார் பெயருல அர்ச்சனை பண்ணுங்க.

மீன ராசி மக்களே!

குரு நார்த் ஈஸ்ட்டுக்கும், சௌத் வெஸ்ட்டுக்கும் இடையில ஈஸ்ட்வெஸ்ட்டுல ரெண்டு டிகிரி நகர்ந்து இருக்கிறதால, நீங்க அடுத்த பஸ்ஸையோ, ட்ரெயினையோ அல்லது அடுத்த சந்திராயனையோ புடிச்சு வியாழன் கெரகத்துக்கு போயிடுறது நல்லது. கடமையைச் செய் பலனை எதிர்பாருன்னு பகவத் கீதையில சொல்லாததால, தேமுதிக மஞ்சக்கலர்ல முண்டா பனியன் போட்டுக்கிட்டா, கலைஞர்கள் வாழ்வில் விடிவு ஏற்படும்.

பரிகாரம்: எந்த ஜோசியக்காரனைப் பாத்தாலும் வெக்கப்படாம கடன் கேளுங்க!

JUST ANOTHER DIMENSION TO LOOK AT LIFE... MAKES A HUGE IMPACT. TRUTHFULNESS APART, JUST READ ON...

2009-01-16T19:28:00.007+05:30

I got this as a forward recently during the Satyam stuff, which is shaking India's Software industry, Another look at the same instance. This goes like this

Dear All,

I (Satyam Employee) am deputed at client location and came across a very interesting conversation in cafeteria yesterday. One of my co-worker, also deputed with the same client through some lesser known two room company, mustered guts to ask me sarcastically in front of entire team, "So, Satyam is gone! What are you guys planning to do now?" In normal circumstances, I have a habit to not to reply to lose talks, but in front of entire team.... I thought I need to fix this guy's thought process. I asked him, as my military training has imbibed in me the habit to fight till last breadth, "Who says Satyam is gone when I am very much alive here and committed to create value on behalf of my company?". He shot back, "Hello Mr., your chairman has resigned, you guys are facing financial turbulence and you still have a face to say that Satyam is not gone!"

At this juncture, I thought of replying to this guy in his own language. I asked him, "Tell me, what will you do and where will you go if our country

India

was not there?" He was not prepared for this level of thought and asked back, "What a stupid question, How can

India

be gone, it is a country?" I asked him back, "Country! What makes a country? Land? Economy? Our Prime Minister? Our President? Our Geography? Or the PEOPLE? If our PM resigns, will you say

India

is gone? If our economy faces a slowdown, will you say

India

is gone? But yes, if the people of a country are lost for any reason, we will say that country has no meaning. Who cares of vast land of Antarctica today which has just one permanent resident, Father Georgy? Which country does it belongs to? Why does not it has any government? Why does not it has any economy? Or, how many countries were there when humans used to hunt for food in pre-historic times? Countries, Wealth, Infrastructures and booming economies are nothing but creations of efforts of PEOPLE, and they do not have any existance on their own. And the final blow was, "When one man can create Satyam as an organization of 53,000 people, why not 53,000 committed people can rebuild one SATYAM?"

Think about it? what did the employees did wrong its that guy RAMALINGA RAJU'S mistake, they were truly working and contributing they never cheated anyone. If that one man can cause bad name to our country why not all other here do something good and nullify it?? From the heart if YOU are a true Indian YOU will know that Raju did nothing more than What Politicians are doing? I am not justifying his action, It is wrong but sitting and discussing is not gonna help. We had Natural Disasters and we helped our brothers and sisters. Now its a Financial Disaster, Artificially created lets face it together as INDIANS, together and lets prove what our country is really known for. Lets not others think we are some cheap cheaters who will do anything for money just because of One Man's action

Height of Misunderstanding-- Good One

2009-01-13T14:22:00.007+05:30

Mr. Sharma comes home one night, and his wife throws her arms around his neck:"I have great news: I'm a month overdue. I think we're going to have a baby! The doctor gave me a test today, but until we find out for sure, we can't tell anybody."
The next day, Mrs. Sharma receives a telephone call from Reliance Energy because the electricity bill has not been paid.
"Am I speaking to Mrs. Sharma?"
"Yes... speaking"
Reliance guy, "You're a month overdue, you know!"
"How do YOU know?" stammers the young woman.
"Well, ma'am, it's in our files!" says the Reliance guy.
"What are you saying? It's in your files ...HOW?????"
" Yes ............ . . We have a system of finding out who's overdue "
" GOD!!!!!!... ...... This is too much........ .."
"Madam, I am sorry... I am following orders.... I have to inform you are
overdue"
"I know that ... let me talk to my husband about this tonight. .... He
will speak to your company tomorrow "
That night, she tells her husband about the incident, and he, mad as a
bull, rushes to Reliance office the next day morning.
"What's going on? You have it on file that my wife is a month overdue?
What business is that of yours?" the husband shouts.
"Just calm down," says the lady at the reception at Reliance, "it's
nothing serious. All you have to do is pay us."
"PAY you? And if I refuse?"
"Well, in that case, sir, we'd have no option but to cut yours off."
"And what would my wife do then?" the husband asks.
"I don't know. I guess she'd have to use a candle."

Nice one came across recently.

2009-01-12T12:28:00.002+05:30

This is the transcript of the ACTUAL radio conversation of a US naval ship with Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland in October 1995. Radio conversation released by the Chief of Naval Operations 10-10-95.

Canadians: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the South to avoid a collision.

Americans: Recommend you divert your course 15 degrees to the North to avoid a collision.

Canadians: Negative. You will have to divert your course 15 degrees to the South to avoid a collision.

Americans: This is the Captain of a US Navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course.

Canadians: No. I say again, you divert YOUR course.

Americans: THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER USS LINCOLN, THE SECOND LARGEST SHIP IN THE UNITED STATES' ATLANTIC FLEET. WE ARE ACCOMPANIED BY THREE DESTROYERS, THREE CRUISERS AND NUMEROUS SUPPORT VESSELS. I DEMAND THAT YOU CHANGE YOUR COURSE 15 DEGREES NORTH, I SAY AGAIN, THAT'S ONE FIVE DEGREES NORTH, OR COUNTER-MEASURES WILL BE UNDERTAKEN TO ENSURE THE SAFETY OF THIS SHIP.

Canadians: This is a lighthouse. Your call.

Address proof card by India Post. Very useful.

2009-01-05T18:15:00.001+05:30

Many working peoples often shift their houses. For them, it is difficult to produce an address proof issued by Govt with latest address.

Our India post (post office) has come up with a solution.

Now you can get an Address proof along with your photo from India post. Since the ID proof is issued by India post which is a central government organization, it is similar to Govt ID cards like Driving license, Voters ID etc.. It can be used for opening bank accounts, for getting telephone/internet connections etc.

The scheme is already in use. In Tamil Nadu, this service is currently provided in Chennai and Coimbatore where number of industries are high. For other districts, you need to enquire in the head post office of corresponding district.

The total cost for getting this ID card is Rs.250/ (Rs.10 for application and Rs.240/- processing fee).

Inform everybody. This is very useful

For more details enquire in the nearest post office and also visit the following links.

The Hindu, Chennai:
http://www.hindu. com/2008/ 08/04/stories/ 2008080457650100 .htm

The Hindu, Coimbatore:
http://www.hindu. com/2008/ 12/09/stories/ 2008120950480200 .htm

Tamilnadu Postal Dept.:
http://www.tamilnad upost.nic. in/psvc/adproof. htm

A Dark Cloud is passing

2008-12-31T12:25:00.001+05:30

At last the dark year is getting over. What a year it was full of pain and sorrow. There were blasts everywhere screams and political games. This was a dark cloud had lot of things which troubled all people. Terrorism, Economic Crisis, Elections and Recession man that was too much for a single year. Science and Spots stood high and provided some positives.

India’s first Individual Olympic gold medal and Indian cricket on the top were some positives. On the whole sports world, what a year it was… Michael Phelps winning 8 Individual Gold medal in a single Olympics, Usain Bolt the world’s fastest man took three Individual Gold medal and Rafael Nadal won Olympic gold dethroned his competitor Roger Federer after a big battle, Saina Nehwal broke into top 10, Abinav Bindra won first Individual Gold medal for India, Viswanathan Anand defeated Vladimir Kramnik of Russia comprehensively to claim the Championship, Lewis Hamilton become the youngest person to win Formula One drivers' world championship, India won Under 19 world cup, Indian golfer Jeev Milkha Singh raced to the top spot, Indian Premier League attracted attention world wide.

Even Sports world had its own crisis like Shaun Pollack, Adam Gilchrist, Sourav Ganguly and Anil Kumble retiring from International cricket, Australian cricket going into a real soup. This year saw the decline of the dominators of the world cricket. India and South Africa broke the myths and Dethroned Australia from its glory. Suddenly Australia looked like a vulnerable side when they failed to prove them selves when they lost Series against India in 0-2 fashion, they managed to gain some confidence when they won home series against New Zealand in 2-0 fashion but then South Africa which toured Australia won first two tests and won the three match series leading Australia to a home series defeat after 16 years. There were nemeses in other sports too Roger Federer losing to Rafael Nadal was a big surprise to tennis fans. Pakistan had tough times this year since no nation wanted to tour them so they went without a single home test the whole year.

Science on the other hand had some positives and its own negatives. India successfully launched its mission to moon Chandrayaan as planned and proved their competency in Astronomy. The much debated Nuclear Deal was signed with US.

Politics had an ugly 2008, the only positive (??) was Barack Obama becoming 44^th US President and was the first African – American President. In India it was ugly, West Bengal was the venue and Trinamool Congress Party chief, Mamata Banerjee revealed the ugly face of Indian politics when she protested against TATA’s Nano car project @ Singur factory and made TATA’s pull out from Singur and forced them to move out of West Bengal. Ratan Tata showed his character and proved that the TATA’s care about the employee’s more than money and moved to Uttranjal. He was the Man of the Year, who showed courage some of them where opening the Taj Mahal hotel in mere 24 days after terror strikes, Tata Motors' Acquisition Of Daewoo and Tata Motor’s plant shifting from Singur to Uttranjal.

IT industry which was a dream venue became Hell and in the name of performance monitoring people where thrown out like waste papers and No where “Ethics” was even heard.

Let this all end with this year and let the new year bring us all happiness and peace.

Wipro chairman Mr. Azim Premji's comment on reservation

2008-12-17T16:32:00.006+05:30

I think we should have job reservations in all the fields. I completely support the PM and all the politicians for promoting this. Let's start the reservation with our cricket team. We should have 10 percent reservation for Muslims. 30 percent for OBC, SC/ST like that.

Cricket rules should be modified accordingly.

The boundary circle should be reduced for an SC/ST player. The four hit by an OBC player should be considered as a six and a six hit by an OBC player should be counted as 8 runs. An OBC player scoring 60 runs should be declared as a century.

We should influence ICC and make rules so that the pace bowlers like Shoaib Akhtar should not bowl fast balls to our OBC player.

Bowlers should bowl maximum speed of 80 km/ hour to an OBC player.

Any delivery above this speed should be made illegal.

Also we should have reservation in Olympics. In the 100 meters race, an OBC player should be given a gold medal if he runs 80 meters.

There can be reservation in Government jobs also. Let's recruit SC/ST and OBC pilots for aircrafts which are carrying the ministers and politicians that can really help the country...)

Ensure that only SC/ST and OBC doctors do the operations for the ministers and other politicians. (Another way of saving the country...)

Let's be creative and think of ways and means to guide INDIAforward. ..

Let's show the world that INDIAis a GREAT country.

Let's be proud of being an INDIAN...

"Education's purpose is to replace an empty mind with an open one."

Chetan Bhagat's speech at Symbiosis Pune - Worth reading

2008-12-17T16:14:00.002+05:30

Good Morning everyone and thank you for giving me this chance to speak to you. This day is about you. You, who have come to this college, leaving the comfort of your homes (or in some cases discomfort), to become something in your life. I am sure you are excited. There are few days in human life when one is truly elated. The first day in college is one of them. When you were getting ready today, you felt a tingling in your stomach. What would the auditorium be like, what would the teachers be like, who are my new classmates - there is so much to be curious about. I call this excitement, the spark within you that makes you feel truly alive today. Today I am going to talk about keeping the spark shining. Or to put it another way, how to be happy most, if not all the time.
Where do these sparks start? I think we are born with them. My 3-year old twin boys have a million sparks. A little Spiderman toy can make them jump on the bed. They get thrills from creaky swings in the park. A story from daddy gets them excited. They do a daily countdown for birthday party – several months in advance – just for the day they will cut their own birthday cake.
I see students like you, and I still see some sparks. But when I see older people, the spark is difficult to find. That means as we age, the spark fades. People whose spark has faded too much are dull, dejected, aimless and bitter. Remember Kareena in the first half of Jab We Met vs. the second half? That is what happens when the spark is lost. So how to save the spark?
Imagine the spark to be a lamp's flame. The first aspect is nurturing - to give your spark the fuel, continuously. The second is to guard against storms.
To nurture, always have goals. It is human nature to strive, improve and achieve full potential. In fact, that is success. It is what is possible for you. It isn't any external measure - a certain cost to company pay package, a particular car or house.

Most of us are from middle class families. To us, having material landmarks is success and rightly so. When you have grown up where money constraints force everyday choices, financial freedom is a big achievement. But it isn't the purpose of life. If that was the case, Mr. Ambani would not show up for work. Shah Rukh Khan would stay at home and not dance anymore. Steve Jobs won't be working hard to make a better iPhone, as he sold Pixar for billions of dollars already. Why do they do it? What makes them come to work everyday? They do it because it makes them happy. They do it because it makes them feel alive. Just getting better from current levels feels good. If you study hard, you can improve your rank. If you make an effort to interact with people, you will do better in interviews. If you practice, your cricket will get better. You may also know that you cannot become Tendulkar, yet. But you can get to the next level. Striving for that next level is important.

Nature designed with a random set of genes and circumstances in which we were born. To be happy, we have to accept it and make the most of nature's design. Are you? Goals will help you do that. I must add, don't just have career or academic goals. Set goals to give you a balanced, successful life. I use the word balanced before successful. Balanced means ensuring your health, relationships, mental peace are all in good order.

There is no point of getting a promotion on the day of your breakup. There is no fun in driving a car if your back hurts. Shopping is not enjoyable if your mind is full of tensions.

You must have read some quotes - Life is a tough race, it is a marathon or whatever. No, from what I have seen so far, life is one of those races in nursery school, where you have to run with a marble in a spoon kept in your mouth. If the marble falls, there is no point coming first. Same with life, where health and relationships are the marble. Your striving is only worth it if there is harmony in your life. Else, you may achieve the success, but this spark, this feeling of being excited and alive, will start to die.

One last thing about nurturing the spark - don't take life seriously. One of my yoga teachers used to make students laugh during classes. One student asked him if these jokes would take away something from the yoga practice. The teacher said - don't be serious, be sincere. This quote has defined my work ever since. Whether it’s my writing, my job, my relationships or any of my goals. I get thousands of opinions on my writing everyday. There is heaps of praise, there is intense criticism. If I take it all seriously, how will I write? Or rather, how will I live? Life is not to be taken seriously, as we are really temporary here. We are like a pre-paid card with limited validity. If we are lucky, we may last another 50 years. And 50 years is just 2,500 weekends. Do we really need to get so worked up? It's ok, bunk a few classes, goof up a few interviews, fall in love. We are people, not programmed devices.

I've told you three things - reasonable goals, balance and not taking it too seriously that will nurture the spark. However, there are four storms in life that will threaten to completely put out the flame. These must be guarded against. These are disappointment, frustration, unfairness and loneliness of purpose.
Disappointment will come when your effort does not give you the expected return. If things don't go as planned or if you face failure. Failure is extremely difficult to handle, but those that do come out stronger. What did this failure teach me? Is the question you will need to ask? You will feel miserable. You will want to quit, like I wanted to when nine publishers rejected my first book. Some IITians kill themselves over low grades – how silly is that? But that is how much failure can hurt you. But it's life. If challenges could always be overcome, they would cease to be a challenge. And remember - if you are failing at something, that means you are at your limit or potential. And that's where you want to be.
Disappointment’s cousin is frustration, the second storm. Have you ever been frustrated? It happens when things are stuck. This is especially relevant in India. From traffic jams to getting that job you deserve, sometimes things take so long that you don't know if you chose the right goal. After books, I set the goal of writing for Bollywood, as I thought they needed writers. I am called extremely lucky, but it took me five years to get close to a release. Frustration saps excitement, and turns your initial energy into something negative, making you a bitter person. How did I deal with it? A realistic assessment of the time involved – movies take a long time to make even though they are watched quickly, seeking a certain enjoyment in the process rather than the end result – at least I was learning how to write scripts, having a side plan – I had my third book to write and even something as simple as pleasurable distractions in your life - friends, food, travel can help you overcome it. Remember, nothing is to be taken seriously. Frustration is a sign somewhere, you took it too seriously.
Unfairness - this is hardest to deal with, but unfortunately that is how our country works. People with connections, rich dads, beautiful faces, pedigree find it easier to make it – not just in Bollywood, but everywhere. And sometimes it is just plain luck. There are so few opportunities in India, so many stars need to be aligned for you to make it happen. Merit and hard work is not always linked to achievement in the short term, but the long term correlation is high, and ultimately things do work out. But realize, there will be some people luckier than you. In fact, to have an opportunity to go to college and understand this speech in English means you are pretty damm lucky by Indian standards. Let's be grateful for what we have and get the strength to accept what we don't. I have so much love from my readers that other writers cannot even imagine it. However, I don't get literary praise. It's ok. I don't look like Aishwarya Rai, but I have two boys who I think are more beautiful than her. It's ok. Don't let unfairness kill your spark.

Finally, the last point that can kill your spark is isolation. As you grow older you will realize you are unique. When you are little, all kids want Ice cream and Spiderman. As you grow older to college, you still are a lot like your friends. But ten years later and you realize you are unique. What you want, what you believe in, what makes you feel, may be different from even the people closest to you. This can create conflict as your goals may not match with others. . And you may drop some of them. Basketball captains in college invariably stop playing basketball by the time they have their second child. They give up something that meant so much to them. They do it for their family. But in doing that, the spark dies. Never, ever make that compromise. Love yourself first, and then others.
There you go. I've told you the four thunderstorms - disappointment, frustration, unfairness and isolation. You cannot avoid them, as like the monsoon they will come into your life at regular intervals. You just need to keep the raincoat handy to not let the spark die.

I welcome you again to the most wonderful years of your life. If someone gave me the choice to go back in time, I will surely choose college. But I also hope that ten years later as well, your eyes will shine the same way as they do today. That you will Keep the Spark alive, not only through college, but through the next 2,500 weekends. And I hope not just you, but my whole country will keep that spark alive, as we really need it now more than any moment in history. And there is something cool about saying - I come from the land of a billion sparks.

Thank You.
Chetan Bhagat

இன்னொரு பாரதி வேண்டும் இந்திய நாட்டுக்கு

2008-12-11T10:45:00.009+05:30

"தேடிச் சோறுநிதந் தின்று
பல சின்னஞ் சிறுகதைகள் பேசி
மனம் வாடித் துன்பமிக உழன்று
பிறர் வாடப் பல செயல்கள் செய்து
நரை கூடிப் கிழப்பருவம் எய்தி
கொடுங் கூற்றுக் கிரையெனப்பின் மாயும்
பல வேடிக்கை மனிதரைப் போலே
நான் வீழ்வே னென்று நினைத்தாயோ?"

- மகாகவி சுப்ரமணிய பாரதியார்.

இன்று மகாகவி சுப்ரமணிய பாரதியின் 126ம் பிறந்தநாள். இதுவரை இந்திய நாட்டில் இவன் போல் ஒரு கவிபிறக்கவும் இல்லை இனி ஒருவன் பிறகாபோவதும் இல்லை.
மனிதர்களே சாதி வெறி பிடித்து அலைந்தகாலத்தில் "காக்கை குருவி எங்கள் சாதி நீள் கடலும் மலையும் எங்கள் கூட்டம்"என்றபாரதியின் பரந்தமனம் யாருக்கு வரும்.
"தனி ஒரு மனிதனுக்கு உணவு இல்லையெனில் இந்த ஜகத்தினை அழித்திடுவோம் !" என்றவர் பாரதியார்.
சுதந்திரம் பெரும் முன்னரேஆடுவோமே பள்ளு பாடுவோமே ஆனந்த சுதந்திரம் அடைந்துவிட்டோம் என்று (ஆடுவோமே ...)" என்று பாடிய தீர்காதரிசி பாரதியார்.
மனைவி பக்கத்து வீட்டில் இரவல் வாங்கி வந்த அரிசியை சிட்டுக்குருவிகளுக்கு இரையாகப் போட்டு பாடி மகிழ்ந்தார் மகாகவி பாரதியார் .
" கவிதை எழுதுபவன் கவியன்று. கவிதையே வாழ்க்கையாக உடையோன், வாழ்க்கையே கவிதையாகச் செய்தோன், அவனே கவி" என்றவர் பாரதியார்
பாரதியார் ஹிந்தி,பெங்காலி,சமஸ்கிருதம்,கூச் மற்றும் ஆங்கில மொழியிலும் சரளமாக பேசவும் கவிதை எழுதவும் ஆற்றல் படைத்தவர் ஆயின் அவர் விரும்பியது காதலித்தது தமிழ் மொழி ஒன்றை மட்டுமே.
எனவே தான் "யாமறிந்த மொழிகளிலே தமிழ்மொழி போல் இனிதாவது எங்கும் காணோம்,"என்றும் " செந்தமிழ் நாடெனும் போதினிலே - இன்பத் தேன் வந்து பாயுது காதினிலே" பாடினார்.

பாரதியின் பிறந்தநாள் அன்று அவர் வாழ்வின் சில தருணங்களை பார்ப்போம், [நன்றி (தினமலர்-திண்ணை பகுதி வாரமலர்) ]

பாரதியார் ஒரு இயற்கை ரசிகன்.

ஒரு சமயம் திருவல்லிக்கேணி கடற்கரைக்கு சென்றிருந்தார் பாரதியார். மழை கடுமையாகப் பெய்து கொண்டிருந்தது. மழையில் நனைந்தபடியே இல்லத்திற்குத் திரும்பிக் கொண்டிருந்தார். அப் போது, இரு இளைஞர்கள் மழைக்குப் பயந்து ஒரு மரத்தடியில் ஒதுங்கி இருந்தனர்.

அவர்களைப் பார்த்ததும், "ஏன், ஒதுங்கிப் பதுங்கி நிற்கிறீர்கள்? தூய, தெள்ளிய நீரை ஆண்டவன் கொட்டுகிறார். அதில் நனைந்து செல்ல என்ன அச்சம்? வாருங்கள்!' என்று கை கோர்த்து மழையில் இருவரையும் அழைத்துச் சென்றார் பாரதியார்.

நல்ல கலைஞன் என்றுமே தன்னுடைய கலையின் மீது கர்வம் உள்ளவன். பாரதியும் கலையின் மீது கர்வம் கொண்டவர்தான்.

1920ல், மதுரைக்கு வந்திருந்தார் ரவீந்திரநாத் தாகூர். அப்போது திருநெல்வேலி போயிருந்தார் பாரதி. ரவீந்திரர் தென்னகம் வந்திருக்கும் செய்தி கேட்டு அருகிலிருந்த நண்பரிடம், "மதுரைக்குப் புறப்பட வேண்டும். ரயில் சீட்டு வாங்கு!' என்றாராம். எதற்கென்று நண்பர் கேட்க, "தாகூரோடு பேசி, அவர் வென்ற நோபல் பரிசைத் தமிழுக்கும் பெற்று தரப் போகிறேன்!' என்றாராம்.
"எப்படி?' என்று கேட்க, "மதுரை சென்று தாகூரிடம், "நீ வங்கக் கவி; நான் தமிழ்க் கவி! விக்டோரியா கூடத்தில் கூட்டம் போடுவோம். உமது நோபல் பரிசை சபைக்கு முன் வையும். இருவரும் பாடுவோம். வெற்றி பெற்றவர் பரிசை எடுத்துக் கொள்வோம். என் பாடலையே ஜனங்கள் சிறந்ததென மதிப்பர். உமது கையாலே அப்பரிசை எனக்குத் தர வேண்டும்!' என்பேன்...' என்றாராம்.

தன்னுடைய தன்மானத்தை பெரிதும் மதித்தவர் பாரதியார்.

ஒரு முறை ராஜாஜியின் மாளி கையில் தங்கினார் காந்தி. அவர் தங்கியிருந்த அறையில் சத்தியமூர்த்தி, ராஜாஜி ஆகியோர் அமர்ந்து பேசிக் கொண்டிருந் தனர். திடீரென்று உள்ளே நுழைந்தார் பாரதியார். காந்தியை வணங்கி விட்டு அவர் பக்கத்தில் அமர்ந்து கொண்டார்.

"மிஸ்டர் காந்தி! இன்று மாலை 5.30 மணிக்குத் திருவல்லிக் கேணிக் கடற்கரையில் ஒரு கூட் டத்தில் நான் பேசப் போகிறேன். அந்தக் கூட்டத்துக்குத் தாங்கள் தலைமை வகிக்க முடியுமா?' என்று காந்தியைக் கேட்டார் பாரதியார்.

அந்த நேரத்தில் மற்றோர் இடத்தில் இருக்க வேண்டிய சூழ்நிலையால், "கூட்டத்தை மறுநாளைக்கு ஒத்தி வைக்க முடியுமா?' என்று திருப்பிக் கேட்டார் காந்தி.

"ஒத்தி வைக்க முடியாது; நான் போய் வருகிறேன்! தாங் கள் துவங்கப் போகும் இயக் கத்தை நான் வாழ்த்துகிறேன்!' என்று போய்விட்டார் பாரதியார்.

பாரதி வெளியேறியதும், "யார் இவர்?' என்று கேட்டார் காந்தி. அவர், "எங்கள் தமிழ் நாட்டுக் கவி!' என்று சொன்னார் ராஜாஜி.

"இவரைப் பத்திரமாகப் பாதுகாக்க வேண்டும், இதற்குத் தமிழகத்தில் ஒருவரும் இல்லையா?' என்றார் காந்தி.

ஒரு நாள் சென்னை தம்பு செட்டித் தெருவில் இருந்த கணேஷ் கம்பெனியின் உரிமையாளரான ராமசேஷய்யர் தமது தோழர்களுடன் பேசிக் கொண்டிருந்தபோது அங்கு வந்தார் பாரதியார். "ஐயர், எனக்கு ஒரு லட்சம் ரூபாய் வேண்டும். நான் இனாம் கேட்கவில்லை, பிச்சையும் புகமாட்டேன். என், "வந்தே மாதரம்...' என்னும் பாடல்களுக்கு விலையாக கேட்கிறேன்...' எனக் கேட்டார்.

கூட இருந்த நண்பர்கள், "வந்தே மாதரப் பாடல்களுக்கா லட்சம் ரூபாய்?' என கேலி செய்தனர். தர்ம சங்கடத்தில் இருந்த ராமசேஷய்யர், பாரதியாருக்குக் கோபம் வந்து விடக் கூடாதே என்ற கவலையில், "மன்னிக்க வேண்டும், என்னிடம் இப்போது லட்ச ரூபாய் இல்லை...' என்றார். உடனே ஒரு நண்பர், "இருந்தால் ஒரு லட்சம் கொடுப்பீரோ? அது பாட்டின் விலையா? பாரதியின் விலையா?' என இளக்காரமாக கேட்டார்.

அதைக் கேட்டு மீசையை முறுக்கி விட்டு எழுந்து நின்று, "வந்தே மாதரம் என்போம், எங்கள் மாநிலத் தாயை வணங்குதும் என்போம்...' என பாடத் துவங்கி விட்டார் பாரதி. இளக்காரமாகப் பேசியவர் அயர்ந்து போனார்; மெய் மறந்தார். எழுந்து பாரதியார் காலில் விழுந்து வணங்கினார். அதைப் பார்த்த ராமசேஷய்யர், "உம்மை ஒரு கணத்தில் பரவசமாக்கிய இப்பாடலுக்கு என்ன விலை கொடுக்கலாம்... நீரே சொல்லும். பாட்டையே விலை மதிக்க முடியாது என்றால் பாரதியின் விலையை மதிக்க யாரால் முடியும்?' என நண்பரிடம் கேட்டார். வாயடைத்து நின்றார் நண்பர்.

தான் நினைத்ததை நினைத்தவாறு பேசுவதில் பாரதிக்கு எந்தவித பயமும் இருந்ததில்லை. பயம்என்னும்சொல் பற்றி பாரதி கேள்விப்டவில்லை என நினைக்கலாம்.

"நமது தேசத்தில் இப்போது சில நூற்றாண்டுகளாக துறவைப் பற்றிய பேச்சு அளவுக்கு மிஞ்சிப் போய் விட்டது.

கண்டவனெல்லாம் ஞானம் பேசுகிறான். ஒன்றரைக் காசின் பொருட்டாக உடலையும், ஆவியையும், தர்மத்தையும் விலைபடுத்தக் கூசாத மனிதர்கள் கூட, "எல்லாம் மாயை, இவ்வுலகமே பொய், கணத்தில் அழிவது இவ் வாழ்க்கை!' என்று கிளிப் பிள்ளைகள் போலத் தமக்குத் தெரியாத விஷயத்தை எளிதாக சொல்லி விடுகின்றனர்."

— அரவிந்தரின் "கர்மயோகி'
இதழில் பாரதியார்.

இந்திய அரசியல் மட்டுமல்ல பாரதி உலக அரசியல் பற்றியும் அறிந்திருந்தார் அதை விமர்சித்துஎழுதியும்உள்ளார்.

"இந்தியாவில் ஆண் பிள்ளைகளுக்குக் கூட வாக்குச் சீட்டு கிடையாது. அதாவது, ஜனங்களுடைய இஷ்டப்படி ஆள் நியமித்து, ஜன சபையாலே நடத்தும் அரசாட்சியுரிமை ஹிந்துக்களுக்குக் கிடையாது. ஹிந்துக்களுக்கு புத்தி சொற்பம். நம்முடைய தேசத்தில் ஆண் பிள்ளைகளுக்குக் கிடைக்காத மேற்படி வாக்குச் சீட்டு சுதந்திரம் வேறு சில இன்னபடி தான் நடக்க வேண்டுமென்று நியமிக்கும் பாத்தியதை, அங்கே ஸ்திரீகளுக்கும் உண்டு.
ஆஸ்திரேலியா, நியூஸிலாந்து, டென்மார்க், நார்வே, யுனைடெட் ஸ்டேட்ஸிலே பாதி, கனடா இத்தனை நாடுகளில் பெண்களுக்கு வாக்குச் சீட்டு கெட்டியாக உண்டு.

இங்கிலாந்திலே கூட அந்த அனுஷ்டானத்தை ஏற்படுத்த வேண்டுமென்று பலர் மன்றாடுகின்றனர். மந்திரி ஆஸ்க்வித் கூட அந்தக் கட்சியை நெடுங்காலமாக எதிர்த்து வந்து, சமீபத்தில் அதற்கனுகூலமாகப் பேசுகிறார். மனுஷ்ய ஜீவனுக்கு இரண்டு வித நிலைமை தான் உண்டு. எதுவும் தன்னிஷ்டப்படி செய்து, அதனால் ஏற்படக் கூடிய இன்ப, நஷ்டங்களுக்கு, தான் பொறுப்பாளியாக இருப்பது ஒரு நிலைமை; அதுதான் சுதந்திரம். அப்படி இல்லாமல் பிறர் இஷ்டப்படி, தான் இஷ்டப்பட்டிருந்தாலும், இல்லாவிட்டாலும், மீறி நடக்கக் கூடாதபடி கட்டுப்பட்டிருத்தல்; அடிமை நிலை. அந்த நிலையில் நம்முடைய ஸ்திரிகளை வைத்திருக்கிறோம். ஹிந்துக்களுக்குள்ளே புருஷர்களுக்கே அரசாட்சியில் வாக்குச் சீட்டு கிடையாது. அவர்களுக்குள்ளே ஸ்திரிகள் அடிமைகள்..." "

— ஜூன் 12, 1917ல் "சுதேசமித்திரன்' இதழில் பாரதியார்.

தாய் நாட்டை சொந்த தாய் போல் நினைத்தவர் பாரதியார்

பாரத மாதாவுக்கு சிலை வைக்க வேண்டும் என்று பாரதியார் முயன்றார். வ.வே.சு.ஐயர், அரவிந்தர், பாரதியார் மூவரும் ஒரு கலைஞரைக் கூப்பிட்டு பாரதமாதா சிலை ஒன்றைச் செய்யச் சொன்னார்கள். சிலையை முடித்த சிற்பி, "மாதாவுக்கு என்ன நகை பூட்டுவது?' என்று கேட்டார்.

ஐயர்,"என்ன நகை பூட்டுவதா? அத்தனையும் தான் வெள்ளைக்காரன் கொண்டு போய் விட்டானே! கையிலும், காலிலும் விலங்கைப் பூட்டு!' என்றாராம். அரவிந்தருக்கும் இது சரி என்று பட்டது.

பாரதியோ கோபம் கொண்டு, "வெள்ளைக்காரன் என்னத்தைக் கொண்டு போய் விட்டான்? இமயத்தையும், கங்கையையுமா கொண்டு போய் விட்டான்? இந்த தேசம் ஒன்றும் பிச்சைக்கார நாடு இல்லை. அவளுக்கு எல்லா நகைகளையும் பூட்டு!' என்றாராம். அப்படியே சிற்பியும் பல நகைகளைப் பூட்டினார். இந்தச் சிலை சிறிது காலம், "சுதேசமித்திரன்' ஆபீஸில் இருந்தது. பிறகு, எங்கே போயிற்று எனத் தெரியவில்லை.

சுதேசிமித்திரன் நாளிதழில், 1920ல் பணிபுரிந்த போது ஒரு நாள் மாலை, ஆசிரியர் சுப்ரமணிய ஐயரும், பாரதியாரும் பாரிமுனைப் பகுதியில் சென்று கொண்டிருந்தனர். இருவரும் ஓர் உணவு விடுதிக்குள் நுழைந்தனர். பலகாரங்களைச் சாப்பிட்டு விட்டு, காபி குடித்தனர். 11 அணாவிற்கு சாப்பிட்டனர். காசாளர் கணக்குச் சொன்ன பிறகே தங்களிடம் காசில்லாமையை இருவரும் உணர்ந்தனர். "பாரதியும், சப்பிரமணிய ஐயரும் சாப்பிட்டனர் எனக் கணக்கு எழுதிக் கொள்!' என உறுதியான குரலில் பாரதியார் கூறியதும், காசாளர் அரண்டு விட்டார். "வீட்டிற்கும் உணவைப் பொட்டலம் கட்டித் தரவா?' என்று அன்புடன் கேட்டார். மறுத்தார் பாரதியார். "போய் வாருங்கள்!' என அன்போடு வழி அனுப்பி வைத்தார் காசாளர்.

Mind blowing Comedy!!!

2008-12-05T15:16:00.001+05:30

Bill Gates organized an enormous session to recruit a new Chairman for
Microsoft Europe. 5000 candidates assembled in a large room. One candidate
is Arun an Indian (Chennai) guy.

Bill Gates thanked all the candidates for coming and asking those who do
not
know JAVA program to leave.2000 people leave the room. Arun says to
himself,
'I do not know JAVA but I have nothing to lose if I stay. I'll give it a
try'

Bill Gates asked the candidates who never had experience of managing more
than 100 people to leave. 2000 people leave the room. Arun says to himself
'
I never managed anybody by myself but I have nothing to lose if I stay.
What
can happen to me?' So he stays.

Then Bill Gates asked candidates who do not have management diplomas to
leave. 500 people leave the room. Arun says to himself, 'I left school at
15
but what have I got to lose?' So he stays in the room.

Lastly, Bill Gates asked the candidates who do not speak Serbo - Croat to
leave. 498 people leave the room. Arun says to himself, ' I do not speak
one
word of Serbo - Croat but
what do I have to lose?' So he stays and finds himself with one other
candidate. Everyone else has gone.

Bill Gates joined them and said 'Apparently you are the only two candidates
who speak Serbo - Croat, so I'd now like to hear you have a conversation
together in that language.'

Calmly, Arun turns to the other candidate and says 'Anna vanakkam,endha
ooru ungalukku' (Means "greetings brother, where are you from?" in tamil)
The other candidate answers 'vanakkam, namakku coimbatore ungalukku endha
oorunga???' (Means "greetings I am from Coimbatore where are you from?" in tamil

How to protect your PEN drive from VIRUS

2008-12-03T14:17:00.001+05:30

Friends many of your PC/laptop's normally gets virus because of Pen Drives or USB devices (Even PC's who are not connected to network ). Some Virus like Ravmon Virus , Heap41a worm which are not detected by anti virus normally spreads mostly by the Pen Drives . In such a case what can you do to prevent your PC from getting infected with Virus that spreads through USB devices or Pen Drives ?

You can protect your PC by just following the simple steps below . It won't take much time.

* Connect your Pen Drive or USB drive to your computer .
* Now a dialogue window will popup asking you to choose among the options as shown in the figure. Don't choose any of them , Just simply click Cancel.
*
* *Now go to Start--> Run and type cmd to open the Command Prompt window .
* *Now go to My Computer and Check the Drive letter of your USB drive or Pen Drive . ( E.g. If it is written Kingston (I:) , then I: will be the drive letter .)
* *In the Command Window ( cmd ) , type the drive letter: and Hit Enter .
* *Now type dir/w/o/a/p and Hit Enter
* *You will get a list of files . In the list , search if anyone of the following do exist
* 1. Autorun.inf
* 2. New Folder.exe
* 3. Bha.vbs
* 4. Iexplore.vbs
* 5. Info.exe
* 6. New_Folder.exe
* 7. Ravmon.exe
* 8. RVHost.exe or any other files with .exe Extension .
*
* If you find any one of the files above , Run the command attrib -h -r -s -a *.* and Hit Enter.
* Now Delete each File using the following Command del filename ( E.g del autorun.inf ) .
* That's it . Now just scan your USB drive with the anti virus you have to ensure that you made your Pen Drive free of Virus .

Hi Frnds...
This virus is very very common now...
To know whether ur system is infected just type C:\ heap41a in the address bar...
if there is a folder named heap41a, then ur system is infected...
(AVAST antivirus is the best solution for this worm...) symantec also works.

Gone are the days!!!

2008-12-03T14:15:00.001+05:30

Something beautiful and might get you nostalgic.

Gone are the days!!!

When

The school reopened in June,
And we settled in our new desks and benches!

When we queued up in book depot,
And got our new books and notes!

When we wanted two Sundays and no Mondays,
Yet managed to line up daily for the morning prayers.

We learnt writing with slates and pencils, and
Progressed To fountain pens and ball pens and then Micro tips!

When we began drawing with crayons and evolved to
Color pencils and finally sketch pens!

When we started calculating
first with tables and then with Clarke's tables
And advanced to Calculators and computers!

When we chased one another in the corridors in Intervals, And returned to the classrooms drenched in sweat!

When we had lunch in classrooms, corridors, Playgrounds,
Under the trees and even in cycle sheds!

When all the colors in the world,
Decorated the campus on the Second Saturdays!

When a single P.T. period in the week's Time Table,
Was awaited more eagerly than the monsoons!

When cricket was played with writing pads as bats,
And Neckties and socks rolled into balls!

When few played "kabadi" and "Kho-Kho" in scorching sun,
While others simply played "book cricket" in the confines of classroom!

Of fights but no conspiracies,
Of Competitions but seldom jealousy!

When we used to watch Live Cricket telecast,
In the opposite house in Intervals and Lunch breaks!

When few rushed at 3:45 to
"Conquer" window seats in our School bus!
While few others had "Big Fun", "peppermint",
"kulfi", " milk ice !" and "sharbat !" at 4o Clock!

Gone are the days
Of Sports Day, and the annual School Day ,
And the one-month long preparations for them.

Gone are the days
Of the stressful Quarterly,
Half Yearly and Annual Exams, And the most
enjoyed holidays after them!

Gone are the days
Of tenth and twelfth standards, when we Spent almost the whole year writing revision tests!

We learnt,

We enjoyed,

We played,

We won,

We lost,

We laughed,

We cried,

We fought,

We thought.

With so much fun in them, so many friends,
So much experience, all this and more!

Gone are the days
When we used to talk for hours with our friends!
Now we don't have time to say a 'Hi'!

Gone are the days
When we played games on the road!
Now we code on the road with laptop!

Gone are the days
When we saw stars shining at Night!
Now we see stars when our code doesn't work!

Gone are the days
When we sat to chat with Friends on grounds!
Now we chat in chat rooms.....!

Gone are the days
Where we studied just to pass!
Now we study to save our job!

Gone are the days
Where we had no money in our pockets and still fun filled on our hearts!!
Now we have the atm as well as credit card but with an empty heart!!

Gone are the days
Where we shouted on the road!
Now we don't shout even at home

Gone are the days
Where we got lectures from all!
Now we give lectures to all... like the one I'm doing now....!!

Gone are the days
But not the memories, which will be
Lingering in our hearts for ever and ever and
Ever and ever and ever .....

Gone are the Days.... But still there are lot more Days to come in our
Life!!

NO MATTER HOW BUSY YOU ARE,
DONT FORGET TO LIVE THE LIFE THAT STILL EXISTS....

Software engineer and his wife

2008-12-03T13:39:00.001+05:30

Husband - hey dear, I am logged in.

Wife - would you like to have some snacks?
Husband - hard disk full.

Wife - have you brought the saree.
Husband - Bad command or file name.

Wife - but I told you about it in morning
Husband - erroneous syntax, abort, retry, cancel.

Wife - hae bhagwan !forget it where's your salary.
Husband - file in use, read only, try after some time.

Wife - at least give me your credit card, I can do some shopping.
Husband - sharing violation, access denied.

Wife - I made a mistake in marrying you.
Husband - data type mismatch.

Wife - you are useless.
Husband - by default.

Wife - who was there with you in the car this morning?
Husband - system unstable press ctrl, alt, del to Reboot.

Wife - what is the relation between you & your Receptionist?
Husband - the only user with write permission.

Wife - what is my value in your life?
Husband - unknown virus detected.

Wife - do you love me or your computer?
Husband - Too many parameters.

Wife - I will go to my dad's house.
Husband - program performed illegal operation, it will Close.

Wife - I will leave you forever.
Husband - close all programs and log out for another User.

Wife - it is worthless talking to you.
Husband - shut down the computer.

Wife - I am going
Husband - Its now safe to turn off your computer

Are you ready for marriage?! Lets findout...

2008-12-03T13:36:00.003+05:30

This one is for all those, who have been bluffed by their partners, that they are ready for the Big 'M'. Believe me you can always fool yourself to think that you are, but there are some Scientific Techniques of finding out the truth.

So it's simple now, just follow any of these listed techniques, and find it for yourself.

1: The Room Trap Technique
Technique Summary: This is a very easy and efficient way to find out. Here's how you can do it.

One fine day enter into your bedroom, take a big iron lock, and lock your room from inside. and then throw the key outside from the window. make sure that you don't have anything of interest with you in the room. No laptops, mobile, porn vids etc...

Now if you are able to stay in that room, without any problem, till someone discovers that you have been in that room for last 2 days, without any food, water and entertainment. It means that you are ready to Go!

Else, if you start feeling TRAPPED! and you start crying for help, you want to get out, but you have no key and you feel helpless....then you have got it, it's what the marriage is all about! stay away from it

2: The Credit Card Abuse Technique
Technique Summary: On one fine day go to a busy market street, and drop your credit card on the road and you are all set, just come back to home. and sit relaxed for month, and wait for your credit card statement to come.

Now please go through the bill and details of how your credit card got abused. If you can take all this and still smile and are in position to pay the bill, then you are ready! just say those words "I do"

Else please understand that your credit card will be abused like this for the rest of your life, and you will have to take all this with a smile on your face. so think twice before you do the DO!

3: The Chewing Gum Technique
Technique Summary: A very simple, quick but effective technique. Go to your nearest super store and buy a single chewing gum. Now put into your mouth and start chewing it, enjoy the sweet flavored juices, which will flow in your mouth for sometime, then the chewing will start turning tasteless, and bland. now you will be tempted to spit the gum and replace with a fresh one. so the real test starts now. You have to keep chewing that gum for the rest of the day. no sweetness, no artificial flavors, no juices, Just a piece of rubber in your mouth.

If you can do it successfully, then the gates of marriage are open and also welcoming you in. Else, some relationships can become like a stale chewing gum, and you have to get used to them, before you get into them.

Hope the above mentioned techniques, will help you in take this important decision of life. These techniques are certified by ISO 2008 Indian Govt Quality Process. Please note that the govt. officials were not bribed to get this done!

Top 22 things an Indian does after returning from "US"

2008-12-03T13:33:00.000+05:30

22. Use Nope for No and Yep for Yes.

21. Tries to use credit card in road side hotel.

20. Drinks and carries mineral water and always speaks of health
conscious.

19. Sprays deo such so that he doesn't need to take bath.

18. Sneezes and says 'Excuse me'.
17. Says "Hey" instead of "Hi".
Says "Yogurt" instead says "Curds".
Says "Cab" instead of "Taxi".
Says "Candy" instead of "Chocolate".
Says "Cookie" instead of "Biscuit"..
Says " Free Way " instead of "Highway".
Says "got to go" instead of "Have to go".
Says "Oh" instead of "Zero", (for 704, says Seven Oh Four Instead of
Seven Zero Four)

16. Doesn't forget to crib about air pollution. Keeps cribbing every
time
he steps out.

15. Says all the distances in Miles (Not in Kilo Meters), and counts
in
Millions. (Not in Lakhs)

14. Tries to figure all the prices in Dollars as far as possible (but
deep down the heart multiplies by 43 times).

13. Tries to see the % of fat on the cover of a milk pocket.

12. When need to say Z (zed), never says Z (Zed), repeats "Zee"
several
times, if the other person unable to get, then says X, Y Zee(but never
says Zed)

11. Writes date as MM/DD/YYYY, on watching traditional DD/MM/YYYY,
says
"Oh! British Style!!!!"

10. Makes fun of Indian Standard Time and Indian Road Conditions.

9. Even after 2 months, complaints about "Jet Lag".

8. Avoids eating more chili (hot) stuff.

7. Tries to drink "Diet Coke", instead of Normal Coke.

6.. Tries to complain about any thing in India as if he is
experiencing
it for the first time.

5.. Pronounces "schedule" as "skejule", and "module" as "mojule".

4. Looks suspiciously towards Hotel/Dhaba food.

Few more important

3. From the luggage bag, does not remove the stickers of Airways by
which
he traveled back to India , even after 4 months of arrival.

2. Takes the cabin luggage bag to short visits in India, tries to roll
the bag on Indian Roads.

Ultimate one:
1.. Tries to begin conversation with "In US ...." or "When I was in
US..."

Lets save INDIA its in our hands.

2008-12-03T09:12:00.001+05:30

Did you know that there is a system in our constitution, as per the 1969
act, in section "49-O" that a person can go to the polling booth, confirm
his identity, get his finger marked and convey the presiding election
officer that he doesn't want to vote anyone!
Yes such a feature is available, but obviously these seemingly notorious
leaders have never disclosed it. This is called "49-O".
Why should you go and say "I VOTE NOBODY"... because, in a ward, if a
candidate wins, say by 123 votes, and that particular ward has received
"49-O" votes more than 123, then that polling will be cancelled and will
have to be re-polled. Not only that, but the candidature of the contestants
will be removed and they cannot contest the re-polling, since people had
already expressed their decision on them. This would bring fear into parties
and hence look for genuine candidates for their parties for election. This
would change the way, of our whole political system... it is seemingly
surprising why the election commission has not revealed such a feature to
the public....
Please spread this news to as many as you know... Seems to be a wonderful
weapon against corrupt parties in India... show your power, expressing your
desire not to vote for anybody, is even more powerful than voting... so
don't miss your chance. So either vote, or vote not to vote (vote 49-O) and
pass this info on..."Please forward this mail to as many as possible, so
that we, the people of India , can really use this power to save our
nation". Use your voting right for a better INDIA.

Presence of mind!!!!!!!! !!!!!!

2008-11-27T11:07:00.000+05:30

In a shop a man asked for 1/2 kg of butter.

The salesperson, a young boy, said that only 1kg packs were available in the shop, but the man insisted on
buying only 1/2 kg.

So the boy went inside to the manager's room and said "An idiot outside wants to buy only 1/2 kg of butter".

To his surprise, the customer was standing behind him.. So the boy added immediately, "And this gentleman wants to buy the other half!!!!!!".

After the customer left, the manager said "You have saved your position by being clever enough at the right time. Where do you come from?".

to this the boy said, "I come from Mexico . The place consists of only prostitutes and football players!!!!! ".

The manager replied coldly, "My wife is also from Mexico ".

To this the boy asked excitedly, "Oh yeah? Which team does she play for?"

Hows that????? Believe in your presence of mind and never panic!!!!!!! !

i've some doubts.. I came across a Good one

2008-11-27T11:05:00.001+05:30

i've some doubts.. Can u please clarify me..

1. When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it? (to be given a thought)

2. If the "black box" flight recorder is never damaged during a plane crash, why isn't the whole airplane made out of that stuff? (very good thinking)

3. Who copyrighted the copyright symbol? (who knows)

4. Can you cry under water? (let me try)

5. Why do people say, "you've been working like adog" when dogs just sitaround all day? (I think they meant something else)

6. Why are the numbers on a calculator and a phone reversed? (God knows)

7. Do fish ever get thirsty? (let me ask and tell)

8. Can you get cornered in a round room? (by oneseyes)

9. Why do birds not fall out of trees when they sleep? (tonight I will stayand watch)

10. If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oilis made from vegetables,then what is baby oil made from? (No comments)

11. What should one call a male ladybird? (Nocomments)

12. If a person suffered from amnesia and then was cured would they rememberthat they forgot? (can somebody help )

13. Can you blow a balloon up under water? (yes u can)

14. Why is it called a "building" when it is already built? (strange isn't it)

15. If you were traveling at the speed of sound and you turned on your radio would you be ! Able to hear it? (got to think scientifically)

16. If you're traveling at the speed of light and you turn your headlights on, what happens?

17. Why is it called a TV set when theres only one? (very nice)

18. Why do most cars have speedometers that go up to at least 130 when you legally can't go that fast on any road?

19. If drink & drive is not allowed why the hell they have parking in Bars?

There are something’s we all didn't know......

2008-11-27T10:49:00.001+05:30

1. Coca-Cola was originally green.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
2. The most common name in the world is Mohammed.
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3.The name of all the continents end with the same letter that they start
with.
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4. The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.
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5. There are two credit cards for every person in the United States .
----------------------------------------------------------------------
6. TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on
one row of the keyboard.
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7. Women blink nearly twice as much as men!
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8. You can't kill yourself by holding your breath..
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9. It is impossible to lick your elbow.
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10. People say "Bless you" when you sneeze because when you sneeze,your
heart stops for a millisecond.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
11. It is physically impossible for pigs to look up into the sky.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
12. The "sixth sick sheik's sixth sheep's sick" is said to be the toughest
tongue twister in the English language.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
13. If you sneeze too hard, you can fracture a rib. If you try to suppress a
sneeze, you can rupture a blood vessel in your head or neck and die.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
14. Each king in a deck of playing cards represents great king from history.
Spades - King David
Clubs - Alexander the Great,
Hearts - Charlemagne
Diamonds - Julius Caesar.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
15. 111,111,111 x 111,111,111 =
12,345,678,987,654,321
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16. If a statue of a person in the park on a horse has both front legs in
the air, the person died in battle. If the horse has one front leg in the
air,the person died as a result of wounds received inbattle.If the horse has
a all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural causes.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
17 What do bullet proof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers and
laser printers all have in common?
Ans. - All invented by women.
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18. Question - This is the only food that doesn't spoil. What is this?
Ans. - Honey
---------------------------------------------------------------------
19. A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.
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20. A snail can sleep for three years.
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21. All polar bears are left handed.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
22. American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating one olive from
each salad served in first-class.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
23. Butterflies taste with their feet.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
24.Elephants are the only animals that can't jump.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
25.In the last 4000 years, no new animals have been domesticated.
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26. On average, people fear spiders more than they do death.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
27. Shakespeare invented the word 'assassination' and 'bump'.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
28. Stewardesses is the longest word typed with only the left hand.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
29. The ant always falls over on its right side when intoxicated.
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30. The electric chair was invented by a dentist.
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31. The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to
the body to squirt blood 30 feet.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
32. Rats multiply so quickly that in 18 months, two rats could have
over million descendants.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
33. Wearing headphones for just an hour will increase the bacteria
in your ear by 700 times.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
34. The cigarette lighter was invented before the match.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
35. Most lipstick contains fish scales.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
36. Like fingerprints, everyone's tongue print is different
---------------------------------------------------------------------
37. And finally 99% of people who read this will try to lick their
elbow

30 Failed Technology Predictions.

2008-10-31T10:47:00.003+05:30

This was something which I came across recently and thought it will be great if I can share this.
1. There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home. Ken Olson, president, chairman and founder of Digital Equipment Corp. (DEC), maker of big business mainframe computers, arguing against the PC in 1977.

2. We will never make a 32 bit operating system .Bill Gates

3. Lee DeForest has said in many newspapers and over his signature that it would be possible to transmit the human voice across the Atlantic before many years. Based on these absurd and deliberately misleading statements, the misguided public has been persuaded to purchase stock in his company a U.S. District Attorney, prosecuting American inventor Lee DeForest for selling stock fraudulently through the mail for his Radio Telephone Company in 1913.

4. There is practically no chance communications space satellites will be used to provide better telephone, telegraph, television, or radio service inside the United States.T. Craven, FCC Commissioner, in 1961 (the first commercial communications satellite went into service in 1965).

5. To place a man in a multi-stage rocket and project him into the controlling gravitational field of the moon where the passengers can make scientific observations, perhaps land alive, and then return to earth - all that constitutes a wild dream worthy of Jules Verne. I am bold enough to say that such a man-made voyage will never occur regardless of all future advances .Lee DeForest, American radio pioneer and inventor of the vacuum tube, in 1926

6. A rocket will never be able to leave the Earth’s atmosphere .New York Times, 1936.

7. Flight by machines heavier than air is unpractical (sic) and insignificant, if not utterly impossible. - Simon Newcomb; The Wright Brothers flew at Kittyhawk 18 months later.

8. Heavier-than-air flying machines are impossible.Lord Kelvin, British mathematician and physicist, president of the British Royal Society, 1895.

9. There will never be a bigger plane built.A Boeing engineer, after the first flight of the 247, a twin engine plane that holds ten people

10. Nuclear-powered vacuum cleaners will probably be a reality in 10 years. - Alex Lewyt, president of vacuum cleaner company Lewyt Corp., in the New York Times in 1955.

11. This is the biggest fool thing we have ever done. The bomb will never go off, and I speak as an expert in explosives.Admiral William D. Leahy, Chief of Staff to the Commander in Chief of the Army and Navy during World War II, advising President Truman on the atomic bomb, 1945.[6] Leahy admitted the error five years later in his memoirs

12. The energy produced by the breaking down of the atom is a very poor kind of thing. Anyone who expects a source of power from the transformation of these atoms is talking moonshine.Ernest Rutherford, shortly after splitting the atom for the first time.

13. There is not the slightest indication that nuclear energy will ever be obtainable. It would mean that the atom would have to be shattered at will. Albert Einstein, 1932

14. The cinema is little more than a fad. It’s canned drama. What audiences really want to see is flesh and blood on the stage. - Charlie Chaplin, actor, producer, director, and studio founder, 1916

15. The horse is here to stay but the automobile is only a novelty - a fad.The president of the Michigan Savings Bank advising Henry Ford’s lawyer, Horace Rackham, not to invest in the Ford Motor Co., 1903

16. The Americans have need of the telephone, but we do not. We have plenty of messenger boys.Sir William Preece, Chief Engineer, British Post Office, 1878.

17. This ‘telephone’ has too many shortcomings to be seriously considered as a means of communication. The device is inherently of no value to us.A memo at Western Union, 1878 (or 1876).

18. The world potential market for copying machines is 5000 at most.IBM, to the eventual founders of Xerox, saying the photocopier had no market large enough to justify production, 1959.

19. I must confess that my imagination refuses to see any sort of submarine doing anything but suffocating its crew and floundering at sea.HG Wells, British novelist, in 1901.

20. X-rays will prove to be a hoax.Lord Kelvin, President of the Royal Society, 1883.

21. The idea that cavalry will be replaced by these iron coaches is absurd. It is little short of treasonous.Comment of Aide-de-camp to Field Marshal Haig, at tank demonstration, 1916.

22. How, sir, would you make a ship sail against the wind and currents by lighting a bonfire under her deck? I pray you, excuse me, I have not the time to listen to such nonsense.Napoleon Bonaparte, when told of Robert Fulton’s steamboat, 1800s.

23. Fooling around with alternating current is just a waste of time. Nobody will use it, ever.Thomas Edison, American inventor, 1889 (Edison often ridiculed the arguments of competitor George Westinghouse for AC power).

24. Home Taping Is Killing MusicA 1980s campaign by the BPI, claiming that people recording music off the radio onto cassette would destroy the music industry.

25. Television won’t last. It’s a flash in the pan.Mary Somerville, pioneer of radio educational broadcasts, 1948.

26. [Television] won’t be able to hold on to any market it captures after the first six months. People will soon get tired of staring at a plywood box every night.Darryl Zanuck, movie producer, 20th Century Fox, 1946.

27. When the Paris Exhibition [of 1878] closes, electric light will close with it and no more will be heard of it. - Oxford professor Erasmus Wilson

28. Dear Mr. President: The canal system of this country is being threatened by a new form of transportation known as ‘railroads’ As you may well know, Mr. President, ‘railroad’ carriages are pulled at the enormous speed of 15 miles per hour by ‘engines’ which, in addition to endangering life and limb of passengers, roar and snort their way through the countryside, setting fire to crops, scaring the livestock and frightening women and children. The Almighty certainly never intended that people should travel at such breakneck speed.Martin Van Buren, Governor of New York, 1830(?).

29. Rail travel at high speed is not possible because passengers, unable to breathe, would die of asphyxia.Dr Dionysys Larder (1793-1859), professor of Natural Philosophy and Astronomy, University College London.

30. The wireless music box has no imaginable commercial value. Who would pay for a message sent to no one in particular?Associates of David Sarnoff responding to the latter’s call for investment in the radio in 1921.

Predictions in the current Economic Scenario

2008-10-22T09:54:00.000+05:30

Survey predicts lower salary hikes in 2009
Wealth conducted a poll on salary hikes you got in this year's appraisal. Here is a snapshot of the results:
* 45 per cent got a hike of less than 10 per cent
* 33 per cent got a hike between 10 to 20 per cent
* 22 per cent got a hike over 20 per cent
Summary: a majority of you got a hike less than 20 per cent.
And, if we go by a survey of Indian Corporates conducted by Hewitt Associates, then the next year may not get any better.
The survey suggests that the global economic slowdown, the US-sub prime crisis and rising inflation have led to companies to re-think their salary budgets for the year 2009.
The survey predicts:
* Salary hike of junior level employees in 2009: 14.4 per cent (compared to 15.2 per cent in 2008)
* Salary hike of mid-level employees in 2009: 13.8 per cent (compared to 14.6 per cent in 2008)
* Salary hike in infrastructure sector in 2009: 18.8 percent (compared to 24.1 per cent in 2008)
* Salary hike in banking, financial services and insurance in 2009: 14.2 per cent (compared to 16.5 per cent in 2008)
* Salary hike in manufacturing in 2009: 15.1 per cent (compared to 15.4 per cent in 2008)
* The telecom sector will see continued growth in India, whereas the IT-ITES sectors which have been adversely affected by the recent dollar-rupee volatility and economic slowdown is treading cautiously on salaries.
The predictions are indeed gloomy. Wealth spoke to financial planner Arvind Rao of Dreamz Infinite, who has some smart tips for getting tough to face the crunch.
Smart tips to face the crunch
Your Spending Habits
* List out your expenditure patterns without being very conservative. Don't cut down on your necessities but try to spend less on luxuries. Then make a proper plan and stick to it.
* Be selective in your choice before taking a loan for your luxury goods. Work out a reasonable repayment pattern with your planner's assistance. Ensure that your EMIs do not exceed 30 per cent of your gross monthly salary.
* If you are planning to take a home loan, read our article to find out where rates are headed. If possible, defer your decision to borrow till the interest rates cool down.
Your Portfolio
* Do not over-estimate your income and under-estimate expenses. Draw out a proper plan to understand where you stand currently and what you wish to achieve.
* Maintain your investments as per your plan and do not get hindered by the market volatility. Try to invest at least 20 per cent of your gross salary.
* Get your financial situation periodically reviewed by your financial planner to spot any unhealthy patterns and take corrective actions accordingly.

Oasis to Mirage

2008-07-21T13:44:00.006+05:30

Oasis to Mirage

I would like to express my transition from real freedom to assumed freedom. I am here talking about my transition from my college to the booming IT industry. I would like to pour my one year experience of the so called glamorous and fun filled IT industry.

We used to wander those spacious heat filled open grounds and dirty class rooms with just 50Rs. in pocket and plan the whole week with that budget. But now we wander along the well cleaned, fully air-conditioned corridors with about five to six credit cards in our pocket planning where to swipe the cards. Credit cards eagerly waiting to eat next month's salary. I can't believe that it was just one year before that the 50Rs. seemed to be lacks now, lacks seems to be nothing.

College canteen, Tea shops were the favorite hot spots where we spent hours together, having a hearty chat with our buddies forgetting the whole world. But now Cafe Day, Quickies, Baristas have taken those places. What a coffee cost 2.5Rs last year has now gone up to 50Rs a cup.

Those precious days where we used to laugh for nothing, while chatting or while playing or even when you fail in your paper because you have got 30 marks for a empty paper. But now you rarely smile except the smile for the forward you just received or the smile to your PM to impress him.

Hateness and Ego were the words you haven't heard in those days. You smash or hit your friend for some reason and the next moment you walk along him with hands on his shoulders. But now you doesn't like the guy sitting beside you because he's getting a salary 10k greater that you or he's always being appreciated by your PM. True friends are hard to find here

In college if some one is talking badly about your college you can find your blood boiling inside even though you don't like your principal. But here loyalty is the lost word, whenever someone is talking badly about your company you join them to criticize your company. You join the company with the resignation day in the mind, is this loyalty. Don't mind I have also planned my resignation date.

You have seen the late nights only on the eve of the exam, where you rely on your friend to wake him/ her at night 1 or 2. And how can we forget those last minute tensions in exam, you remember that only just before entering the exam you find that you have forgotten to revise a important question that your friend suggested that it will surely appear on this exam. You rush back and flip those Xeroxed pages with tension. But today you work at least 2 days a week till 1 or 2 in the night to deliver something to your unknown client who is at US or UK. You are aimlessly typing at the useless word document that your PM asked you to finish with his tailor made smile. Loads of tension with calls from home, with your eye lids eager to kiss each other and you promise them to allow it a little later, cursing Bill Gates for inventing Ms Word.

Writing all these to celebrate my first anniversary at this field. It seems I have been in my own desert where I have realized that I am moving from the warmth ness of the Oasis to chase a mirage. A mirage that promises a lot of thing, but still its just a mirage. When I turn back I can find thousands chasing that mirage with a ID card around their neck.

I wish all the best for them.

Urs Truthfully,
A Software Engineer.

Last Day @ work....

2008-07-21T13:44:00.003+05:30

A Boss looking through his Mail Box was astonished to see a mail from an
Employee who was supposed to be busy working at Client side on a critical
project. It had the subject - "TaTa - Bye Bye". With the worst
premonition
he opened the mail and read the content with trembling hands:-

Dear Sir,

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you, but I'm
leaving the
job. The offer was too lucrative and attractive for me to turn down. I had
to abscond because I wanted to avoid a scene with the HR and you. I am sorry
but I had no choice.

The project is working fine. There are only 108 issues pending, out of which
only 38% issues are High Priority. Hence I am sure there is no need to worry
about. The next Phase of major enhancements I have been working upon, have
been completed halfway. I am sure the new person who would replace me would
not understand what all I had done so far. Hence, for his and your
convenience, I have taken care to remove all the work that I had been doing
this far for nearly 3 months now. I am sure you will appreciate my insight
and "big heart".
I am of course retaining the Originals that I had retrieved for the purpose
of Passport verification with me, considering it as a parting gift from you.
Of course, I will not pay the bond amount that I owe the company (since I Am
breaking the bond). But I will consider this as a parting gift from our Dear
company. I moving out of town since the new company is situated in another
City.

Also, I have changed my contact number. So you will not be able to get in
touch with me, to congratulate me. But I know your blessings are always with
me. Last but not the least. I also have the Rs 12000 entrusted to me by our
company's cultural events group, for the upcoming movie event. I am sure
you
would have wanted me to keep it with myself as an added bonus from our
company. I respect you very much, hence your wish is my command.

Don't worry sir. I am 2 years experienced now, learning so much from your
company. So I will surely use this knowledge to write better programs for
the new company. Someday I'm sure we will meet sometime in the future. If
you wish, I will surely be glad to give my employee reference for you to
apply for a job in the new company which I am joining.

Your faithful employee,
S. W. Engineer

At the bottom of the page were the letters "PS". Hands still
trembling, the
Boss read:

PS: Dearest Boss, none of the above is true. I'm am still busy working at
client side. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life
than my "Request to reconsider my Salary Appraisal" attached with
this mail.
Please approve it and call when it is safe for me to come to our Office to
discuss this.

My respect and Best Regards to you!

Difference between Focusing on Problems and Focusing on Solutions

2008-07-21T13:44:00.001+05:30

Case 1: When NASA began the launch of astronauts into space, they found out that the pens wouldn't work at zero gravity (ink won't flow down to the writing surface). To solve this problem, it took them one decade and $12 million. They developed a pen that worked at zero gravity, upside down, underwater, in practically any surface including crystal and in a temperature range from below freezing to over 300 degrees C.

And what did the Russians do...?? They used a pencil.

Case 2: One of the most memorable case studies on Japanese management was the case of the empty soap box, which happened in one of Japan 's biggest cosmetics companies. The company received a complaint that a consumer had bought a soap box that was empty. Immediately the authorities isolated the problem to the assembly line, which transported all the packaged boxes of soap to the delivery department. For some reason, one soap box went through the assembly line empty.
Management asked its engineers to solve the problem. Post-haste, the engineers worked hard to devise an X-ray machine with high-resolution monitors manned by two people to watch all the soap boxes that passed through the line to make sure they were not empty. No doubt, they worked hard and they worked fast but they spent a whoopee amount to do so.

But when a rank-and-file employee in a small company was posed with the same problem, he did not get into complications of X-rays, etc., but instead came out with another solution. He bought a strong industrial electric fan and pointed it at the assembly line.

He switched the fan on, and as each soap box passed the fan, it simply blew the empty boxes out of the line.

Moral : Always look for simple solutions. Devise the simplest possible solution that solves the problems.

Management Traps and How to Avoid Them

2008-07-21T13:43:00.004+05:30

Much has been written about the secrets of good management and few will argue that the best managers are inspired, visionary, dedicated, industrious, energetic, energizing and display integrity, leadership, common sense and courage. So where is it that managers commonly fail or falter and lose their precious foothold on the corporation's top rungs? The following, from the career experts at bayt.com, are ten of the most basic management traps and tips to avoid them:

Weak managers set weak goals

As a manager your role is to get specific jobs completed by employees in the most optimal, efficient and innovative manner and in order to do that, you need to set clear objectives. Successful managers set SMART goals - goals that are specific, measurable, achievable, realistic and time-based. They are able to communicate these goals clearly, simply and concisely to their employees so that none are vague or uncertain about expectations. By all means reach for the stars in your objectives but to do so without supplying employees with the training, resources, flexibility and freedom they need to accomplish their goals and a schedule of regular supervision and feedback is to set them (and yourself) up for failure.

Weak managers micro-manage - effective leaders inspire

The days of command and control organizations are long over - today's managers recognize that in order to leverage their skills and maximize their team's output they need to adopt a flexible approach and 'lead' their teams to excellence rather than closely supervise, instruct and control them. The best leaders communicate to their employees a vision and ignite in them the fire, motivation and desire to work towards making this vision a reality. Good leaders unleash their employees to innovate and achieve optimal solutions by communicating top-level goals and objectives and a suggested blueprint for success then leaving the employees to determine how to get there most optimally while ensuring they have the aptitudes, training, resources and work environment necessary to achieve superior results. While a program of regular feedback and supervision is essential, managers should ensure that their management style is not repressive, meddling or overly overbearing. The golden rule is to communicate the 'what' and the 'why' of the work that needs to be done and leave the employees to determine the 'how' without burdening them with strict instruction manuals or prescribed rules and patterns that are largely redundant and inconducive to speed, creativity, progress and innovation.

Weak managers are afraid of hiring/cultivating strong leaders

Strong leaders/managers have the self-confidence to hire the best people, take them to new levels and cultivate in them all the qualities needed to make them in turn effective leaders of the future.. Weak leaders replicate themselves in their hiring decisions and hire mediocre players, mistakenly believing that an employee with more skills, acumen or industry knowledge than themselves will ultimately undermine them or make them look bad. The best managers are characterized by an ability to stimulate their employees to superior performance and through coaching, training, feedback as well as by example, inspire in them all the qualities needed to make effective managers. A good manager helps employees achieve their full potential and constantly raises the bar so that employees never stop learning, innovating and growing. Coaching, training, career planning and programs for ongoing growth and development of key staff are high on the priority lists of the best managers.

Weak managers belittle their employees

Bosses who favour the archaic 'tough' management style where employees are singled out for public reprimand and negative feedback is plentiful while recognition and positive reinforcement are scarce will fail to win the loyalty, respect and commitment of their teams over the long run. Without an inspired, fired up, self-confident employee base these managers set themselves and their teams up for failure. Effective leaders by contrast, respect their employees and give them regular feedback with intelligent constructive criticism and loudly laud special accomplishments in both public and private, while communicating any negative feedback ONLY in private and focusing such criticism strictly on the job performance, not the person's character. Strong leaders recognize and reward a job well done. These leaders inspire their teams to perform at their best and are able to elicit from them a high degree of loyalty and a 'hunger' to raise the bar and continuously excel. In such organisations, employees are not afraid to challenge their boss's ideas or upset the status quo in the interest of innovation and excellence and are encouraged to take risks to elevate the business to a new level. The autocrats and bureaucrats on the other hand sap their employees' self-confidence, drive and energy with their overbearing management style and fail to induce in them any motivation to raise the bar or excel.

Weak managers have obsolete skills-strong leaders constantly reinvent themselves

In today's knowledge-driven economies and highly competitive environment, skills, training and education rapidly become obsolete and effective managers know that they must constantly re-educate themselves and update their skills to maintain an edge. While over-confident managers with an inertia to further education fall by the wayside, good managers regularly take an honest inventory of their skills and abilities and upgrade their technical knowledge and soft skills wherever appropriate. They encourage their teams to do likewise with sound career planning and performance appraisal programs and an emphasis on training and self-education.

Weak managers have poor communication skills

Good communication includes cultivating and maintaining open channels of communication with the team and others in the organisation, giving constructive, intelligent feedback, eliciting ideas through brainstorming sessions or otherwise, articulating the company vision and mission in no uncertain terms, setting clear objectives and listening attentively with an open-mind to employees grievances, suggestions and any other issues. Effective leaders have an open-door policy that welcomes input, suggestions and feedback from employees and recognize that good ideas and the next best idea/process/innovation can come from anywhere. Strong leaders listen; weak leaders talk. Strong leaders pay attention to their employees and encourage them to express professional opinions and ask for more responsibility; weak leaders think they are above such open-door policies. Employees who are not listened to and are not made to feel important or respected as professionals or individuals are unlikely to innovate or express any exciting new ideas that can move a company forward.

Weak managers blame

Everybody makes mistakes and strong leaders protect their good people from taking the fall when they err. Good bosses recognize that the occasional slip-ups are inevitable and can be learning opportunities and are ready to take personal responsibility when the team makes a misstep. A good boss realizes that his most promising employees want to succeed, will grow as a result of their mistakes and are unlikely to repeat the same mistakes. They do no set their people up as a negative example for the rest of the organization nor point fingers when the going gets tough. Good bosses are personably accountable for their actions as well as the actions of their subordinates and do not allow a culture of blame to permeate the organisation.

Weak managers take full credit for their team's accomplishments

While weak leaders usurp all the credit for a job well done by their teams, the strongest leaders will give the full credit to the team as a whole or the team member responsible for the project. Strong leaders motivate, energize and inspire by giving credit where credit is due and being generous with reward and recognition wherever appropriate. Strong leaders publicly thank their employees for a job well done and recognize that a motivated, successful, energized team will reflect directly on the boss.

Weak managers thrive on bureaucracy

Weak leaders are fond of, augment and live well with the layers and bureaucratic shackles that tie an organisation down; strong leaders remove them. Today's effective leaders recognize that in order to compete they must operate like a small company with a high level of speed, responsiveness and flexibility. They realize that to maintain their edge in today's marketplace their organization needs to be responsive to changing market conditions and remove the shackles, boundaries, layers, clutter and obsolete policies, procedures and routines that get in the way of the freedom and free flow of people, resources and ideas.

Weak managers are divorced from their teams

Effective managers genuinely care about their employees and take the time to get to know them and to understand their strengths, weaknesses, what makes them tick and their goals and ambitions. They also take the time to learn something about their personal life. While weak managers will maintain an outdated aloofness and a formal distance from their teams, exceptional managers are able to bring out the best in every employee and win their loyalty and respect by understanding their unique needs, motivations and abilities and showing the team that they are important and personally significant. Strong managers are team players and through their constant involvement with their teams communicate to them that they are there for them and supportive of them. Effective managers by building a supportive work environment, build a camaraderie and team spirit that enthuses and excites the team to new levels of performance.

Cool One

2008-07-21T13:43:00.003+05:30

Someone out there either has too much spare time or is deadly at Scrabble.
(Wait till you see the last one)!

FLORENCE NIGHTINGALE
When you rearrange the letters:

FLIT ON CHEERING ANGEL

DILIP VENGSARKAR
When you rearrange the letters:

SPARKLING DRIVE

PRINCESS DIANA
When you rearrange the letters:

END IS A CAR SPIN

MONICA LEWINSKY
When you rearrange the letters:

NICE SILKY WOMAN

ASTRONOMER:
When you rearrange the letters:

MOON STARER

DESPERATION:
When you rearrange the letters:

A ROPE ENDS IT

THE EYES:
When you rearrange the letters:

THEY SEE

GEORGE BUSH:
When you rearrange the letters:

HE BUGS GORE

THE MORSE CODE
When you rearrange the letters:

HERE COME DOTS

SLOT MACHINES:
When you rearrange the letters:

CASH LOST IN ME

ELECTION RESULTS:
When you rearrange the letters:

LIES - LET'S RECOUNT

SNOOZE ALARMS:
When you rearrange the letters:

ALAS! NO MORE Z 'S

A DECIMAL POINT:
When you rearrange the letters:

IM A DOT IN PLACE

THE EARTHQUAKES:
When you rearrange the letters:

THAT QUEER SHAKE

ELEVEN PLUS TWO:
When you rearrange the letters:

TWELVE PLUS ONE

AND FOR THE GRAND FINALE:

MOTHER-IN-LAW:

When you rearrange the letters:
WOMAN HITLER

Try to Crack this Guys - Questions asked at IIM-B during recruitments

2008-07-21T13:38:00.002+05:30

Proctar and gamble had participated in IIM-Bangalore's Placement Sessions sometime back. They asked some interesting questions to students during recruitment.
Here are some of them:-

1. There is one word in the English language that is always pronounced incorrectly. What is it?
2. A man gave one son 10 cents and another son was given 15 cents. What time is it?
3. A boat has a ladder that has six rungs, each rung is one foot apart. The bottom rung is one foot from the water. The tide rises at 12 inches every 15 minutes. High tide peaks in one hour. When the tide is at it's highest, how many rungs are under water?
4. There is a house with four walls. Each wall faces south. There is a window in each wall. A bear walks by one of the windows. What color is the bear?
5. Is half of two plus two equal to two or three?
6. There is a room. The shutters are blowing in. There is broken glass on the floor. There is water on the floor. You find Sloppy dead on the floor.
Who is Sloppy? How did Sloppy die?
7. How much dirt would be in a hole 6 feet deep and 6 feet wide that has been dug with a square edged shovel?
8. If I were in Hawaii and dropped a bowling ball in a bucket of water which is 45 degrees F, and dropped another ball of the same weight, mass, and size in a bucket at 30 degrees F, both of them at the same time, which ball would hit the bottom of the bucket first? Same question, but the location is in Canada?
9. What is the significance of the following: The year is 1978, thirty-four minutes past noon on May 6th.
10. If a farmer has 5 haystacks in one field and 4 haystacks in the other field, how many haystacks would he have if he combined them all in the center field?
11. What is it that goes up and goes down but does not move?
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1. The word "incorrectly."
2. 1:45. The man gave away a total of 25 cents. He divided it between two people. Therefore, he gave a quarter to two.
3. None, the boat rises with the tide. Googly
4. White. If all the walls face south, the house is at the North pole, and the bear, therefore, is a polar bear.
5. Three. Well, it seems that it could almost be either, but if you follow the mathematical orders of operation, division is performed before addition.
So... half of two is one. Then add two, and the answer is three.
6. Sloppy is a (gold)fish. The wind blew the shutters in, which knocked his goldfish-bowl off the table, and it broke, killing him.
7. None. No matter how big a hole is, it's still a hole: the absence of dirt.
8. Both questions, same answer: the ball in the bucket of 45 degree F water hits the bottom of the bucket last. Did you think that the water in the 30 degree F bucket is frozen? Think again. The question said nothing about that bucket having anything in it. Therefore, there is no water (or ice) to slow the ball down...
9. The time and month/date/year American style calendar are 12:34, 5/6/78.
10. One. If he combines all of his haystacks, they all become one big stack.
11. The temperature.

Don't Miss To Read....

2008-07-21T13:37:00.001+05:30

The train has started moving. It is packed with people of all ages, mostly
with the working men and women and young college guys and gals. Near the
window, seated a old man with his 30 year old son. As the train moves by,
the son is overwhelmed with joy as he was thrilled with the scenery
outside..

" See dad, the scenery of green trees moving away is very beautiful"

This behavior from a thirty year old son made the other people feel strange
about him. Every one started murmuring something or other about this
son."This guy seems to be a krack.." newly married Anup whispered to his
wife.

Suddenly it started raining... Rain drops fell on the travelers through the
opened window. The Thirty year old son , filled with joy " see dad, how
beautiful the rain is .."

Anup's wife got irritated with the rain drops spoiling her new suit.

Anup ," cant you see its raining, you old man, if ur son is not feeling well
get him soon to a mental asylum..and dont disturb public henceforth"

The old man hesitated first and then in a low tone replied " we are on the
way back from hospital, my son got discharged today morning , he was a blind
by birth, last week only he got his vision, these rain and nature are new to
his eyes.. Please forgive us for the inconvenience caused..."

The things we see may be right from our perspective until we know the truth.
But when we know the truth our reaction to that will hurt even us. So try to
understand the problem better before taking a harsh action.

The best out of office auto replies....

2008-07-21T13:36:00.002+05:30

1: I am currently out at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get the position. Be prepared for my mood.

2: I'm not really out of the office. I'm just ignoring you.

3: You are receiving this automatic notification because I am out of the office. If I was in, chances are you wouldn't have received anything at all.

4: Sorry to have missed you but I am at the doctors having my brain removed so that I may be promoted to management.

5: I will be unable to delete all the unread, worthless emails you send me until I return from vacation on 4/18. Please be patient and your mail will be deleted in the order it was received.

6: Thank you for your email. Your credit card has been charged $5.99 for the first ten words and $1.99 for each additional word in your message.

7: The e-mail server is unable to verify your server connection and is unable to deliver this message. Please restart your computer and try sending again.'

(The beauty of this is that when you return, you can see how many in-duh-viduals did this over and over).

8: Thank you for your message, which has been added to a queueing system. You are currently in 352nd place, and can expect to receive a reply in approximately 19 weeks.

9: Please reply to this e-mail so I will know that you got this message. I am on holiday. Your e-mail has been deleted.

10: Hi. I'm thinking about what you've just sent me. Please wait by your PC for my response.

11: Hi! I'm busy negotiating the salary for my new job. Don't bother to leave me any messages.

12: I've run away to join a different circus.

AND, FINALLY, THIS ONE TAKES THE ICING ON THE CAKE :

13: I will be out of the office for the next 2 weeks for medical reasons. When I return, please refer to me as 'Loretta' instead of 'Steve'.

Must Read:Awesome Master piece

2008-07-21T13:36:00.001+05:30

Isn't it amazing that George Carlin - comedian of the 70's and 80's - could write something so very eloquent...and so very appropriate.

A Message by George Carlin:

The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but shorter tempers, wider Freeways , but narrower viewpoints. We spend more, but have less, we buy more, but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgment, more experts, yet more problems, more medicine, but less wellness.

We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom.

We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.

We've learned how to make a living, but not a life. We've added years to life not life to years. We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor. We conquered outer space but not inner space. We've done larger things, but not better things.

We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul. We've conquered the atom, but not our prejudice. We write more, but learn less. We plan more, but accomplish less. We've learned to rush, but not to wait. We build more computers to hold more information, to produce more copies than ever, but we communicate less and less.

These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion, big men and small character, steep profits and shallow relationships. These are the days of two incomes but more divorce, fancier houses, but broken homes. These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality, one night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill. It is a time when there is much in the showroom window and nothing in the stockroom. A time when technology can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to share this insight, or to just hit delete...

Remember; spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever.

Remember, say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will grow up and leave your side.

Remember, to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is the only treasure you can give with your heart and it doesn't cost a cent.

Remember, to say, 'I love you' to your partner and your loved ones, but most of all mean it. A kiss and an embrace will mend hurt when it comes from deep inside of you.

Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment for someday that person will not be there again.

Give time to love, give time to speak! And give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind.

AND ALWAYS REMEMBER:

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

George Carlin